No Joke: KFC Offers a Fried Chicken Corsage for Prom

Categories: Really?!?!?

What's next? A burger boutineer?
Yes. We checked the date. We're way past April 1st and this not an April Fool's Joke. This is real. KFC is actually promoting corsages made of its fried chicken drumsticks to tie around your prom date's wrist--because what a carnation can do, a piece of Original Recipe can do better.

They even made a weird little commercial for it where a dwebby guy surprises his date with one, and she's more than delighted.

Think you can pull it off? You can buy yours from the official KFC site (, which will redirect you to the website of a real florist in Kentucky. For $20 (plus shipping), you'll be sent a corsage made of primarily baby's breath. Though the corsage doesn't come with chicken, it includes a $5 gift certificate redeemable for some at your local KFC, or maybe a corn on the cob if your date's vegetarian.

Here's the description from the florist's site to prove that I'm not making any of this up and also that the KFC marketing folks know how to get viral attention.

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The 5 Most Horrible Things To Have Ever Happened at a Dive Bar (Possibly)

Photo by Weekly Dig
Normally, great places to drink!

As Taylor "Hellcat" Hamby knows and frequently reveals in her wonderful weekly column, Dive, Dive My Darling, some weird (and often times horrible) shit goes down at your local dive bars, from vagina-shaving discussions to the worst bruschetta in Orange County, and much more in between.

Need more proof? Earlier this week, a Reddit thread asked dive bar bartenders to tell their most horrible stories, and well, they're doozies.

Curious? Check out the five most horrible stories after the jump. Some of these pretty bad, so don't say I didn't warn you.

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How to Instagram Your Food Without Looking Like an Asshole

Photo by Elke Wetzig
Pictured: not you

I literally take Instagrams for a living. Like, seriously, that's basically what people give me money to do. Now, I'm not claiming to be an expert, but I have learned a thing or two about IGing food in public places.

Beautiful food pictures are everything, but they're not worth looking like a douche over. Too often do people look like tools nowadays trying to get the perfect shot... that tend to look horrible anyway. Here are some tips of the trade to make sure you avoid being an ass the next time you eat out:

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Miso Soup Saves Hawaiian Man's House

Categories: Really?!?!?

Photo by Jessica Spengler
Picture: Flame retardant

What do you do when you're house is on fire? Throw anything wet you can find on it, including miso soup as was the case in Hawaii last Saturday.

Hawaiian man Reuben Prensky woke up to the sound of fire Saturday, finding a plastic sink in flames when he went looking for the source of the noise, according to the Honolulu Star Advertiser. He threw the nearest source of water he cold on the flames -- a giant pot of miso soup.

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Stages of Romantic Relationships Through Meals: A Completely Fictional Study

Photo by Ali West
How long have they been dating? Two months? Two years?

Relationships are perilous minefields of miscommunication. Countless people have spent countless hours trying to figure out if it's the right time to wear sweatpants or go without makeup.

How are you supposed to know when the honeymoon period is over and you can stop turning on the shower each time you use the bathroom? Facial cues and body language? It's a mystery.

Unless you're paying attention to what you're eating. A couple's meals together reveal more than how hungry they are, they'll also tell you what phase of their relationship their in, from courtship to the honeymoon stage and full on true love.

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Portland, Maine Bakery Gets a Cease and Desist Over Their 'Crauxnut'; Renames It the C&D

Categories: Really?!?!?

Photo by Michelle Woo

What do you do if you get sued for calling your fried, dough-nut-shaped, layered (and probably overrated) pastry a "Crauxnut"? If you're Little Bigs Bakery in Portland, Maine, you take a pot shot and change the name.

According to the Bangor Daily News, Little Bigs owners James and Pamela Plunkett received a cease and desist earlier this month after selling their crauxnut to the wonderful foodies of Maine since January. They decided to change the name, and after asking their Facebook fans, ended up with the "C&D." Clever, but not as clever as the crauxnut.

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Cantina: Give Us a Bag of Limes, and We'll Give You a Cocktail for 25¢

Thumbnail image for limecut.jpg
Horde up!
Here at SAFII, we've been covering the explosion in lime prices due to Mexican chaos for a week now, but we somehow missed this: last week, Fullerton's excellent Matador Cantina offered a hell of a special. Bring in a bag of limes, and they'd give you one of their craft cocktails for a quarter.

Is this how desperate restauranteurs are now for limes? The answer, of course, is yes!

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Mexican Restaurants Now Charging Customers for Limes in Wake of Massive Price Hikes

Thumbnail image for limecut.jpg
Green gold
So there I was at a local taquería, ready to chow down on four tacos al pastor, when I noticed something was missing: a lime wedge.

As I wrote last week, the wholesale price of a 40-pound case of limes from Mexico--where the vast majority of limes bought in the U.S. are grown--is reaching unprecedented levels due to chaos south of the border caused by the drug wars (although the Mexican government is putting the blame on a plague). When I wrote the post, a case cost $90; on Saturday, a local restauranteur tweeted a photo of a case costing $105. I warned in my post that customers would be feeling the pinch soon, as limes help Mexican food reach its heights from the taco to guacamole to ceviches and more.

Back to the missing lime wedge. I asked the taquero what was going on, and he said he'd give me one--but he'd have to charge me extra.

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Pizza Patron Under Fire for Naming Pizza "La Chingona"

"Censored," for those who don't habla...
Ah, Mexican Spanish: the language that, pound-for-pound, has more double entrendres, puns, and desmadre than any language on Earth. And a great example of the language's ever-charming vulgarity comes courtesy of Pizza Patrón, the Texas-based chain that sells pizzas marketed toward Mexicans and has a sole OC outpost in--where else?--SanTana.

They're currently marketing a pizza called "La Chingona," a paisa pie with jalapeño-flecked pepperoni topped with more jalapeños. The controversy, though, comes with the name, which literally translates as "The Fucking Bad Ass" because its root verb, chingar, means "to fuck up." Mexicans, however, understand "La Chingona" to mean "The Badass"--in other words, it's no more a vulgarity in contemporary Mexican Spanish than "badass" is in contemporary American English.

But it's chingona's root meaning that have radio and television stations in a tizzy, leading to them banning any mention of Pizza Patrón's "La Chingona" from their airwaves.

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Idaho Hockey Fans Sue Arena Over Making a Small Beer and a Large Beer the Same Size

Categories: Really?!?!?

It's all lies

Several hockey fans are suing CenturyLink Arena in Boise over what they say is deceptive advertising. They claim they were fooled into thinking a $7 large beer was bigger than the $4 small when they were actually the same size.

Honestly, I'd just be happy to order the small (I mean really, a sports venue with $4 beers). But hey, if they're feeling litigious, litigate.

The lawsuit was filed two days after a video proving the beers were the same size went big online. You can check it out after the jump.

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