Five Valentine's Day Food Gifts That Probably Won't Get You Laid

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Uncommon Goods
​Guys, if your gal is the type who's into Valentine's Day, have you gotten her anything yet? (Pssst, it's tomorrow.) I can't tell you what gifts will guarantee you'll get some lovin' (though you can't go wrong with a tiara). I can, however, offer you five food-related gifts that don't exactly scream romance, unless she has a twisted sense of humor, which in that case, go you!   
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Five Things I'd Like To Import From New Jersey and New York

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Flickr user mpd01605

I've been out for a while dealing with some family stuff on the East Coast--you know I'm not originally from Califas, right?--and while it was pretty draining stuff, I did still have to eat. While the town I grew up in has turned into a bougie commuter paradise (they've got a fancy Wegman's, for crying out loud), I eschewed a lot of the newer stuff and did the greatest hits of all the things I can't get out here.

While I'm so glad to be home where vegetables are plentiful and cheap, here are five of the things I wish I could have taken home with me.
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Four Big Facts The Daily Got Wrong In Its History of the Burrito

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Photo by Professor Salt
The cylindrical god in its El Toro Bravo manifestation

Here's to hoping my Taco USA: How Mexican Food Conquered America is hitting the cultural caliente list at the right time--and it is, if you go by recent histories on Mexican food published by mainstream publications. I know Smithsonian Magazine is working on something because they called me for comment about the tamale wagons of 1900s California (but never got my comment . . .). Its blog did a good piece on the history of Fritos, and The Daily, Rupert Murdoch's iPad-only publication, just published a history of the burrito.

But that Daily article, like most Murdoch-owned news efforts, is laughably wrong, relying on half-truths and Wikipidia-ed myths to spin a tale suitable for a gullible public.

To wit:
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5 Dishes That are Surprisingly Easy to Make at Home

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Flickr user palindrome6996
Everything you need to be sucessful

Yes, I know I went on a big stink about what kind of food people shouldn't make at home. That's not because I hate cooking; that was because some dishes are just bad ideas, whether due to difficulty of technique, time commitment or cost. Plenty of things are really easy to make at home, some of which end up tastier and more economical than at restaurants.

So, fire up your range, 'cause it's a lot easier to do than dealing with an annoying hipster waiter.
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How To Drink In a Craft Cocktail Bar: Five Tips

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Flickr user dinnerseries

You walk up to a bar to get a drink and you notice they've got six types of rye, one kind of vodka, a lineup of brown-glass medicine bottles with eyedroppers, infusing jars where the line of beers normally sits, and really freaking pretty ice. Congratulations: you've stumbled into a craft cocktail bar, a place where cocktails are created with the same precision and care as food in a high-end restaurant.

Great, so... now what? You want a drink, they want to serve you a drink, but you're at an impasse as to how to get one, because no two craft cocktail bars have the same offerings. I put the question to some of Orange County's top bartenders, and this is what they had to say.
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5 Strange Video Game-Inspired Dishes From Japan

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Here in the United States, we do silly things like honor our precious movie stars by naming sandwiches after them. To name a few, there are the "Woody Allen" at Carnegie Deli in New York, "The Salma" and "The Kiera" at Hot Doug's in Chicago, and "Marilyn Monroe"--a Thanksgiving-style turkey sandwich served at Flashback Diner in Florida.

Food culture is slightly different in Japan though. In the land of the rising sun, it isn't uncommon to find food dishes that are inspired by popular video games. That's right, eating a dish that looks like your favorite video game character is quite common in Japan.

Don't worry, don't expect to see something as creepy as eating a grilled Pikachu after the jump (there are some things that come awfully close though!). The following are five video game-inspired dishes from Japan.
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5 Foods That Always Taste Better Made at Restaurants than Made at Home. Always.

Categories: Five Great...
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If I hear someone pronounce EVOO i-vuu one more time, I'm going to shoot myself...

You. Yeah, I know you. Your knife skills are up there with the best line chefs in Orange County. Your knife block costs more than a month of my rent. Every time you watch Top Chef, Chopped, or Iron Chef, you come up with your own dishes, which would totally beat out the competitors. You are the star home chef. I used to be just like you. That is, before I attempted a few ill-advised dishes.
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Six Ways to Stop Being a Douchebag at Starbucks

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Flickr user bertogg

You probably don't know it, but every time you go to a Starbucks, 14 people behind you in line are shooting daggers at you and trying to kill you by modulating their alpha waves . . . and yes, it's your fault. You're the inconsiderate, self-absorbed douchebag, and you infest every coffee shop in America.

The following list is meant to serve as an open intervention to you all. There is hope; cast aside your douchebaggery.
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Shuji's Top Five Restaurants for 2011

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ProfessorSalt.com
Tacos & Carnitas Sahuayo

It's the time of year again when I select a short list of five favorite restaurants. I love places with a tiny menu, tightly focused on producing one thing or variations on the thing at which they excel. Often, that specialist is an ethnic hole-in-the wall, but this year, I've also chosen two somewhat more upscale restaurants that excel at their particular brand of obsession.More >>

Anne Marie's Top Five Restaurants of 2011!

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Anne Marie Panoringan

Being the (relatively) new kid on the blog, I over-thought what I should include in my top five. All I really had to do was think about the places I'd already revisited without hesitation, and the answers were right there. Also, I've interviewed all but one, and getting to know the people behind the cuisine absolutely impacted my feelings towards trying them out. My five share a passion for their craft, and it shows with every meal.
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