"What do you think is better--breakfast or dinner at IKEA," my chica asked while she scarfed down pasta and vegetables with marinara sauce and I enjoyed a slightly-better-than-so-so chicken alfredo.

"Breakfast," I replied.

"Why," my best friend, Art, asked.

"Because it's cheaper," I said, before adding, "Besides, it's better food."

He cast me a mocking look. Yes, gentle readers: I'm a cheapskate. But IKEA is better for breakfast--99 cents for a so-so breakfast as opposed to $4 for the cheapest combo platter? No contest. This discussion quickly stopped, however, as I began forking through the mandeltarta, otherwise known as almond cake.

I've always been puzzled about the etymological origins of the nut, wondering why the English almond and Spanish almendra were so far apart from the Northern European mandel. I always thought that the Spanish word came first, derived from Arabic due to the Moors, then sailed across the English Channel allah other words like algebra, and that mandel derived from Old German or some other proto-tongue. But according to this entry (much more reliable than Wikipedia for etymological purposes, I tell you what), the two share the same root: amendla, from the Vulgar Latin.The al- in Spanish and English doesn't come from Arabic but Old French.

Strange...as is the flavor of IKEA's mandeltarta. It's almond overload: shaved almonds on top of an almond-spiked cream and almond bread. Don't expect a sugary, frosty concoction with the mandeltarta; it's just like its nutty in flavor, naturally creamy, not too sweet, underrated and quite the dessert. At a buck and change, it's a great dessert--and pared with lingonberry juice, perfect to fuel the IKEA homestretch with a chick that wants to buy every damn item.

IKEA, 1475 South Coast Dr., Costa Mesa, (714) 444-4532.

I'm a constant at OC Weekly Best of 2008 Best Restaurant Avanti Cafe's World Tuesday, when the restaurant's junior chefs Veronica and Bartosz pick a culinary theme for a month and then take turns preparing a three-course (soup, entree, dessert) dinner. December is the islands of Europe--here's the lineup:

Bart's KRK ISLAND, Croatia
Tuesday, December 2

Bean, Potato & Sauerkraut Soup
Parsley Walnut Pesto & Roasted Tomato Mini Pizza
Waffle w/ Sour Cherry Compote

Veronica's MAJORCA, España
Tuesday, December 9

Majorcan Soup - cabbage & bread soup
Tumbet- eggplant stew
Flaó - cream cheese mint tart

Bart's SARDINA, Italy
Tuesday, December 16

Bean Tomato Soup w/ Fennel
Semolinia Gnocchi w/ Marinara
Almond Nugat Bar

This smorgasbord of yummys cost $9.50 for lunch, $11.50 for dinner!

How do you get a free dinner? Easy--I'll be there at 7pm today on the spot. First person to ask me to buy them this dinner gets it; second one gets a free dessert. That simple--food stalkers of the world, unite!

Avanti Cafe, 259 E. 17th St., Costa Mesa, (949) 548-2224

Stylistic note: photo is not of Taquerias Guadalajara, nor is Calvin pissing on a location. He's pissing on the logo of the Chivas, the Guadalajara-based soccer team whose colors and goat mascot Taquerias Guadalajaras uses for promotions. Chivas pelan.

For years, Taquerias Guadalajara was the pale runner-up to Taquería de Anda, the homegrown OC taco empire. But, as I noted earlier, Taquería de Anda's quality has fallen as precipitously as its prices have increased, leaving Taquerias Guadalajara prime to capture the crown of OC's best taco chain. But, as I always note, I cannot in good conscience ever recommend folks to spend more than a buck on a taco--it's a sin as cardinal as charging for chimichurri. I don't care that Taquerias Guadalajara's tacos are pretty damn good--not too small, with a well-cooked tortilla housing perfectly charred meat. $1.39 for this taco ain't worth it.

However...for the past couple of months, the location on First Street in SanTana has offered diners a bargain--tacos de carne asada or al pastor for 89 cents Monday through Thursday from 3 p.m.-10 p.m. This, amigos, is a deal--one of the best remaining for a full-sized taco in la naranja. Even then, I don't think enough people are taking advantage of the bargain; recently, they printed little cards with a laughing, leaping man under the headline (in Spanish): Crisis Special!!! Laugh at the Economy but with a Full Gut. Could it be because a much-better deal is next door?

Taquerias Guadalajara, 1904 W. First St., SanTana, (714) 547-7515

Well, it's finally happened. When I thought there was no possible way that IKEA could improve upon the price it charges for their egg-bacon-potato $0.99 breakfast plate -- see my review HERE -- they've gone ahead and done just that: IT WILL BE FREE!

At least for one day. And not coincidentally, it will be the most important day for retailers like IKEA: November 28th. "Black Friday".

None other than my friend and informant Brekkie Fan broke the news to me. And if you know Brekkie Fan, you know she loves her breakfasts! I mean, it's IN HER NAME!

She writes:

"Free + breakfast = Yay! I know you've done the 99 cent brekkie, and so have I. It's worth paying the actual buck, but for free? Even better.

CLICK HERE, and SCROLL TO THE LAST PAGE FOR THE COUPON

Remember: you heard it here on Stick a Fork In It first, before you'll hear it everywhere else! And from who?! Our trusty informant: The BREKKIE FAN herself.

You should ALWAYS pick up a copy of the OC Weekly every week, but if there was ever a week where you'd be stupid NOT to pick one up, it's this week.

Why? There's a gift certificate inside for a free meal at Sandella's Flatbread Cafe. And you don't even have to go looking for your scissors. The insert will just slip out from the middle of the paper (along with another insert that, ahem, isn't food related).

It expires 11/26/2008, it's one coupon per customer, and it's not redeemable for cash; but other than that, there is NO CATCH. No purchase is necessary.

Just bring the coupon to the Sandella's location at 2801 W. Macarthur Blvd., Santa Ana (Open Mon.Fri. 6 AM-9 PM, Sat.-Sun. 7 AM-7 PM) and redeem it for one of the following: Wrap, Panini, Quesadilla, Rice Bowl, Grilled Flatbread (pizza), or Salad.

Now, I haven't tried Sandella's. In fact, I didn't know anything about it until today when the coupon slipped out of my copy of The Weekly!

But let's be fair, people. Don't be grabbing stacks of The Weekly just for the coupons and don't rifle through them just to steal the inserts. We may be in recession, but we still live in a nice, civil society. At least I hope so.

On November 4th only, come in to any of Zov's three locations showing your "I Voted" sticker, and they'll give you a free slice of, what else, American apple pie.

Of course, before you get the free slice, they require that you either dine in and purchase any menu item, or order a "Zov's Family Take-Out Dinner for 2 or 4". But what did you expect? Free food with no strings attached? This is America! And what's more American than good ol' fashioned promotional marketing and lawyer-y fine print.

Since filing for bankruptcy protection, David Wilhelm's Culinary Adventures seems to be doing something proactive about it: offering cheap meals.

For those just tuning in, Savannah is a rebranding of Chat Noir -- an effort to make the place more seem downscale and affordable. But as I noted in this review, the dinner prices, even the make-up of most of the dishes, were exactly the same...it was still Chat Noir -- the same ol' pussy cat with a different name tag.

But now they're actually serving bargain-priced "express" lunches. This new offering is advertised via a banner, draped outside their building facing the street. It proclaims that all lunch items are between $4-$9, served Monday – Friday, 11:30 - 2:00 pm.

Looking at their sample menu online, it looks promising. $9 for a French Dip with homemade chips or salad? That's about how much it would cost at any number of sandwich shops out there.

Tell all your friends! Tell your neighbors! Michael Mina's givin' out free food at Stonehill Tavern. Okay, so it's not exactly his tasting menu; It's just a few canapes, about three or four types per night, served at the bar every Thursday from 5:30 PM to 7 PM. They're doing this for the rest of the year.

I called them to ask what to expect, and the nice lady who answered mentioned that the hors d'oeuvres can be anything that's fresh or they feel like making that day. Kobe beef sliders? Tuna tartare? Lobster spring rolls? Who cares? It's free and it's presumably made by the same chefs who craft Stonehill Tavern's super luxe dinners.

Plus, she said, their cocktails are discounted to $9. Usually they retail at about $16-18.

If this sounds like Happy Hour, it is; but don't dare call it that. This is Michael Mina's at the St. Regis, after all. Call it what they call it: "social hour".