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Oscar Mayer's Now Selling Lunchables for Adults!

Categories: Really?!?!?

adult_lunchables.jpg
I miss the boxes :(

No one told me, but I was apparently supposed to stop eating Lunchables at some point in my life. How do I know? Well, earlier this week Oscar Mayer announced a new Lunchable-esque product aimed directly towards adults -- the Portable Protein Pack (they could've worked some more on the naming).

There's no Oreos, no room temperature dessert pizza, and definitely no Capri Sun. Instead, it's just cheese, nuts, and meat. Man, what's even the point?

Oscar Mayer has got its wires crossed a little bit. The little protein packs are obviously for the health conscious. All four varieties come with at least 13 grams of protein and fit in under 200 calories, but the marketing? Super Internet bro-y. Like Old Spice but less funny and unoriginal.

I mean, just check out this commercial.

Does that look like someone who only wants to eat 170 calories worth of something?

I'm going to stick to my Lunchables proper. When they release their chicken nuggets with one of those juice box-sized wine boxes, someone let me know.

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9 comments
Barbara Younger
Barbara Younger

Bacon is hogging all the space on facebook. I love it.

fishwithoutbicycle
fishwithoutbicycle topcommenter

But I thought humans themselves were Portable Protein Packs...just ask any cannibal...or any "walker"... :-D

949girl
949girl topcommenter

Lunchables are disgusting, both for the actual content and the sodium.  Why would anyone buy those for their kids?  And why would an adult buy them for themselves.  That one part of the grocery store where all of the processed meats are at frightens me.  It's the area I avoid, the factory farmed sodium death trap.

Brainwashed_in_church
Brainwashed_in_church topcommenter

@949girl Totally agree. As Jack LaLanne used to say "If man made it, don't eat it." Here's an example of a healthier, easier, and cheaper alternative: Buy a block of cheese, a loaf of bread, and leftover chicken or beef or fish from the night before. Most whole foods are healthier and cheaper. Once food is processed, additives are included and costs goes up. Include a few slices of that pure cheese, a couple slices of the whole wheat bread and a couple slices of that cooked meat. Stick them in a bag. Take them for lunch with some fruit and a cookie. Total cost for your much healthier lunch: $0.85 and two minutes.


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