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Sorry, Stockpilers: The Shelf Life Of A Twinkie Is Only About 25 Days

Categories: News
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The world is mourning the news that Hostess Brands Inc., maker of the iconic comfort sweets Twinkies, Ding Dongs, Snowball Cakes and Ho Hos, plans to shut down. As expected, social networks have spiraled into full-fledged panic mode, with nostalgic shoppers racing to stores to stockpile the plastic-wrapped snacks. After all, Twinkies basically last forever, right? 

It's a common urban legend that the "golden sponge cake with creamy filling" has an absurdly long shelf life--in Disney's WALL-E, a Twinkie is found completely undecayed, 700 years after the Earth is deemed uninhabitable. And once, a science teacher in Maine kept an unwrapped Twinkie atop his chalkboard for 30 years, telling the Associated Press, "It's rather brittle, but if you dusted it off, it's probably still edible."

But what's the actual shelf life of a Twinkie? Only about 25 days, according to Theresa Cogswell, former vice president for research and development at Hostess' parent company Interstate Bakeries Corp. In 2005, she told the Washington Post, "You can eat older Twinkies, but they're just not as good as when they're fresh. Then they're awesome." Still, as the newspaper noted, 25 days is still pretty darn impressive for a "baked" good, but then again, there's no dairy-based ingredients in them, only flour, sugar, oil, eggs and chemicals we can't pronounce.  

So if you must, go ahead and hoard those last boxes on the shelves--eating an old Twinkie probably, maybe won't kill you. But don't expect them to still be as tasty in the post-apocalyptic world. You're probably better off with Spam.  

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11 comments
Burns
Burns

Nice of you to snark over the loss of 18,000 jobs. Ask not for whom the axe falls, it falls for thee...

909Jeff
909Jeff

Not to worry Michelle I heard after market close on Friday that a buyer was already in play! And contrary to bob newmans comment below... Hostess was emerging from chapter 11 under the current CEO who actually specializes in bringing companies out of bankruptcy. What bob the union honk won't tell you is that hostess actually made an agreement with the teamsters which is a vastly stronger union than the bakers union. Unfortunately the bakers union thought they could call hostesses bluff.... Well oops there is no bluff! So good job organized labor you just fucked 18500 people out of a job. Hopefully the buyer is successful and pulls off the acquisition! After all there is a shit ton of value in the brand!

Bob Newman
Bob Newman

Once the owners of the Hostess brand have squeezed the last dime out of the company’s assets (Bain Capital style), a new licensee will be producing Twinkies, probably out of Mexico.

Vickie Perez
Vickie Perez

Would they still taste better if froze them and save later to eat?

Peyton Farquhar
Peyton Farquhar

Not likely seen the last of these things. Grupo Bimbo will take over and the price of Twinkies will increase by a buck and the employee wages operating the machinery will plummet down to mexican wages.

Charles Lam
Charles Lam

I just finished eating the last Hostess cupcake in Chinatown, Seattle. Dem feels man.

Jack Green
Jack Green

Hopefully they'll be back. Remember when Mother's Cookies went under? A year or so later they were back on the shelves, same great taste.

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