Diatribe With Dave: Five Moves That'll Piss Off Your Bartender
3. Tell the Bartender to "Make it Strong"
Ooohhh, this one's irritating. Want stiff drinks all night? Walk in, order and tip the bartender 30 bucks. I guarantee you're gonna get 60 bucks worth of booze back over the course of your evening. Or just man up and order a double in a pint glass.
4. Expect the Bartender to Always Pay for Your Drinks Because You're Pretty
This one's just for you, ladies! Don't stand there all poopy and confused when the bartender asks you to pay for your drink. Even worse is when a chick starts digging through her purse/junk drawer looking for her wallet while everyone waits. When this happens, I just throw her drink away and move on to the next person. Have your wallet out and payment ready. Please.
5. Forget to Start a Tab
Your long-suffering bartender is a lot of things: friend, advisor, maybe even the person who is gonna get you laid that night. You know what he or she is not? An ATM machine. Using the same credit card over and over again to pay for your two-dollar Pabst Blue Ribbons is especially irritating, particularly when the joint is jumping. If you are over 21, that means you are an adult and adults open tabs. Be an adult. If you want to be regarded as visiting royalty at your favorite watering hole conduct yourself in a manner befitting such. Bartenders are neither court jesters nor hired help. There are two people in the tavern equation. They both like to be treated well.
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