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Lessons Learned By Accidentally Walking Into a Little Saigon Tittie Café

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Dave Lieberman

I was getting my car serviced at Tom Vo's last week (shameless plug--the guy is awesome) and was thirsty, so I walked around to the corner of Harbor and Fifth and saw a Vietnamese coffee shop. I nearly didn't go in; it had bars on the patio and dark-tinted doors. In Little Saigon, that can mean only one thing: the coffee comes with scantily-clad women who make conversation with you while you nhau.

The car service was only going to take ten minutes, so I did not need to sit and play video poker in the smoky atmosphere, but while the women and their artificially inflated chests made desperate conversation with the fat My trắng who wandered into the café, I did notice one very important thing.

Vietnamese iced coffee at a bakery: $2.
Vietnamese iced coffee with titties: $5.

Obvious conclusion: In Little Saigon, titties cost $3.00.

If that's your thing, the coffee was actually pretty good; just make sure to sit and get your $3 worth. Me, next time I'll buy an agua fresca from Pacific Market next door or a cup of jus de chaussettes (American coffee) from the donut shop on the other side and leer at the pretty women for free.

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