The Register today profiles Amy Adams, star of Disney's recent hit ENCHANTED, and kicks of with a rather spicy quote:

"I boned a duck today," she boasted from the back of a taxicab as it sped through the streets of New York City.

Yes, these are heady times for the hottest actress in Hollywood

Wait...anybody check to see if Mickey's pal Donald is walking funny today? Uh, turns out that's not quite what was meant.

It seems she's talking about cooking classes she's been taking, and in fact, she de-boned a duck in the kitchen.

Tell me I'm not the only one who was thinking of something else, and wondering how the hell Register editors missed the double-entendre.

DEAD END FOR TOLL ROAD: LA Times, OC Register - The California Coastal Commission voted 8-2 to deny the Transportation Corridor Agencies a coastal development permit for their Foothill-South (241). The Register says over 2,000 people showed up; the Times says over 3,500 attended. One surfer in attendance estimated 5,000 attendees, considering the 3,000 full seats and the number of people standing, both inside and out. It was the largest Coastal Commission hearing turnout in history, and made the New York Times.

MR. MOLESTER, MS. TRIAL: OC Register - Sid Landau, convicted child molester, has long since served his sentence. However, thanks to a deadlocked jury it seems he will remain in a mental hospital at county expense rather than being remanded to his brother's care. I can't wait until I earn more money so I can pay more taxes so I can help pay for this crap.

GREAT PARK BOARD GAMES: OC Register - Christine Shea and Stephen Choi walked out of a closed-door Great Park Board meeting, claiming the Board was inappropriately discussing a new deputy executive offer. The Register, like an inconsiderate lover, gives us plenty of juicy conflicting info, like "Tuesday's agenda listed public employment, specifically 'deputy chief executive officer' as the topic for the closed session," as well as "[Larry] Agran said the board did not create a position or discuss creating a position in the closed session." But there's no climactic connection; no discussion of the implications of this contradiction, other than the obvious - it WAS a meeting about the position, but everyone just sat around playing Tetris on their mobile phones rather than accomplish anything.

Rabbits rabbits, y'all. Rabbits to the motha-effin' rabbits. Happy February. Don't forget there's 29 days in this one.

RESISTANCE IS FUTILE: LA Times - Who knew it took dozens of officers and over $25,000 taxpayer dollars just to send one girl to the mental hospital? Wait, she's not a girl. No, she's more than a girl ... not yet a woman. Or was that back then, and now she's a woman? Either way, she's not that innocent. Did you know LA cops similarly abduct 20 to 25 people a day? Minus the gross abuse of police resources, of course. Thanks for the coverage of crucial world issues, Times.

HOBO BANDIT CAPTURED ON CANVAS: OC Register - A local bank teller, Nicholas Wildermuth, painted a picture of the Hobo Bandit which will be displayed in the Hive Gallery in LA. The Reg calls it "Van Gogh-esque." Does that mean they're liable if Wildermuth mails his ear to an ex?

BUT NEITHER OF THEM ARE CHICKEN: OC Register - Report says the two Cessnas that crashed over Corona didn't try any evasive tactics, flying straight toward each other for five seconds or so. The crash claimed two Orange County men, Brandon William Johnson, 24, of Costa Mesa and Anthony Joel Guzman, 20, of Yorba Linda.

POORMAN SUES KDOC: LA Times - Dana Parsons covers the Poorman with typical dollops of smarminess. No genital warts mentioned whatsoever. I'd wax moronic but Luke Y. Thompson already covered this like a month ago (Exit Poorman, Feb. 3). So will he be a Richman? Do fiddlers play on roofs?

DEBBIE #1 GETS A BREAK: OC Register - Deborah Carona, wife of former Sheriff Mike Carona, will not be charged with inappropriate behavior while a member of the Orange County Fair Board, although the prosecution "continues to allege that she participated in schemes to profit from her husband's office." Regardless of what she's charged with, we all know the poor thing is only guilty of marrying a man so tasteless as to choose a mistress with the same name, albeit abbreviated, as his wife, and to allow them both to become involved in his Machiavelli-meets-Rain-Man schemes.

TCA CAN'T BREAK THE LAW (ANY MORE): LA Times - David Reyes maintains the Times' position as 2nd-best source of Foothill-South coverage (next to the Weekly, of course) with this informative piece on the passage of the National Defense Authorization Act 2008, and with it the Davis Amendment which repeals previous exemptions which allowed the Foothill-South to evade California law.

(ANOTHER) OC SOLDIER KILLED IN IRAQ: OC Register - Army Pfc. Brandon Abbott Meyer was killed Monday while on patrol in Mosul. According to the Department of Defense he was from Orange. Meyer and four other soldiers killed fought with 1st Battalion, 8th Infantry Regiment Team, 4th Infantry Division from Fort Carson, Colorado. Meyer joined the Army in January 2007 and would have turned 21 on Saturday. Not old enough to drink in his country, but old enough to die for it.

I hope you're sitting down. For one thing, checking a blog while standing up is just ... weird.

BYE-BYE RENT CONTROL? LA Times - A June 3rd ballot proposal could end the practice of rent control in California. Lawyers and landlords are both circling. If you prick a landlord, does it not bleed?

PEDESTRIAN KILLED IN HUNTINGTON BEACH: OC Register - Not that it's a slow news day at the Reg (it is); I just wanted to point out an innocent death in Huntington Beach not caused by a police officer. A twentysomething young man is believed to have been crossing Beach Blvd. against a red light. Which is when one is usually struck and killed.

IDENTIFICATION IN CAMP PENDLETON DEATH: OC Register - A Marine found dead early Sunday, the second Marine death reported from the base this week, has been identified.

"Lance Cpl. Johnathon K. Goffred, 22, a Johnson County, In. native was an infantry rifleman serving with the 3rd Battalion, 1st Marine Regiment at Camp Pendleton, according to a press release issued today by the United States Marine Corps. He joined the Marine Corps June 8, 2005, and returned from a combat deployment to Iraq in support of Operation Iraqi Freedom last year."

COSTA MESA EUTHANIZES D.A.R.E. PROGRAM: Daily Pilot - Costa Mesa is no longer willing to pay the cost of what is arguably an ineffective program. Drug and alcohol resistance and education in school seems like a redundancy to many; after all, what else IS school anyway? And for those without parents to instill such values - well, often those parents teach through bad example far more than their kids will learn in some program, the enjoyment of which will have them branded as a narc and a pussy.

"THE DISASTROUS FOOTHILL SOUTH TOLLWAY": LA Times - Our neighbor to the north might have a problem acknowledging R. Scott Moxley's reporting on the Sheriff Carona scandal (not to mention the New York Times), but they got this right: Governor Schwarzenegger's support of the 241 toll road is incomprehensible.

"Maybe Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger was trying to make up for planned cuts to state parks. Otherwise, it's hard to imagine what could have led to his recent support for the Foothill South toll road."

One one hand, yes it's a bit same-y. On the OTHER hand - how often does the former sheriff of (let's be honest) one of the most important counties in America get in so much hot fudge and creamery butter FBI-style?

Not often, sir. And/or madam. Not often at all.

HOW TO REPRESENT CARONA: LA Times - A good look at how former Sheriff Michael Carona, while earning hundreds of thousands of dollars a year for not working, somehow managed to retain a firm pro bono - "Though not unheard of, the case -- defending an allegedly corrupt sheriff who is making about $200,000 a year in retirement -- is unusual by pro bono standards. Typically, pro bono work involves providing legal services to society's most vulnerable -- the indigent, the homeless, the infirm."

ROHRABACHER'S PARK DOUBLE-SPEAK: Daily Pilot - According to the Pilot, Rohrabacher cannot help with the threatened cutbacks on state parks. Surfin' Dana says this of the Governor's threat to close 48 parks:

“They are trying to scare people and keep the system the way it is, and we need to make it better and more efficient.”

Rohrabacher has no control over the situation because he’s a federal lawmaker, but state legislators vow to do what they can to stave off the cuts.

And yet he can support a toll road through another State Park. Fascinating.

MEANWHILE, BACK IN MICHAEL CORONA: LA Times - Former Sheriff Mike Carona, not to be confused with former club hit "My Sharona," wants secret tapes of his conversations with pervert-father Don Haidl thrown out of court.

"According to the filing, investigators broke the law when they had former Assistant Sheriff Don Haidl use a body wire to record conversations with Carona on July 7, July 15 and Aug. 13. Such recordings are admissible as evidence in federal court only if the target of the investigation hasn’t retained an attorney — but Carona had had legal counsel for two years and prosecutors knew it, his attorneys argue."

One can't help but wonder where he stashed that body-wire.

Good morning children. On this day in history in 1848, James Sutter first found gold at Sutter's Mill, starting the California Gold Rush. In 1935, the first cans of beer were sold in the US. And in 2003 the Department of Homeland Security began operation. Hooray beer, boo Homeland Security.

Read this while the coffee takes hold:

STATE PRISON RECEIVER CANNED: LA Times - Out goes Robert Kelso after only two years. Why? Assemblyman Todd Spitzer (R-Orange), a local boy who chairs a committee on prisons, said Sillen had "alienated every single party that was necessary to solve the crisis." And maybe it had something to do with all the sex offender deaths.

UCI COP INTO WATERSPORTS: OC Register - UCI Police Dispatcher Scott Cornelius is on paid administrative leave while the university investigates why Cornelius's photo site has the photo credits for shots of OC high school water polo players which appeared on gay-themed websites. One shot of a lad adjusting his trunks has received thousands of page views, it seems. Hey, good thing the guy's getting paid, right? Otherwise he couldn't afford to take pictures of youngish boys in swimwear.

MORE DEVORE: Daily Pilot - Assemblyman Chuck Devore, master of the 70th District, announced his plans to run for re-election and not for Senate. Maybe now he can finally make it legal to grow industrial hemp in California. Keep it green, Chuck.

WATCH OC DEPUTIES BEAT A PRISONER: KABC - What better way to start the day than watch a horde of Sheriff's deputies taze and beat seven circles of hell out of Matthew Fleuret? Now Mr. Fleuret is suing the department for $47 Million. See the video for yourself and soak in R. Scott Moxley's commentary. Where do you think you'd have less of a chance of survival - the OC jail or the California prison system?

What you get to read this morning:

SOBER-LIVING HOME DEBATE: LA Times - Balboa Peninsula's plethora of sober-living homes faces the wrath of the Newport Beach City Council as well as the Concerned Citizens of Newport Beach. One wonders whether these Citizens are related to the Cannery Village Concerned, who tried to have the Newport Brewing Company closed because (eek) it was a bar! Welcome to the peninsula, douchebags.

WATER POLO GONE WILD: OC Register - Photos of OC high-school water-polo players appear alongside apparently-dubbed "action shots" on gay websites. Yeah it's from Sunday - but come on. Thanks for slumming with us, Reg!

"FLEEING" ROBBER?: OC Register - In what's likely to be the worst description of a robber since the Wet Bandits, the Register describes a Laguna Beach bank robber as "fleeing" - as opposed to all those polite, sedentary, motionless robbers who hold stock-still waiting for police apprehension to arrive.

COSTA MESA MAN SLAIN IN CORONA CRASH: Daily Pilot - Brandon William Johnson of Costa Mesa was among the five killed when two small planes crashed above Corona, CA. Johnson, 24, recently graduated from Chicago's Roosevelt University with an MBA in real estate. He was studying to be a commercial pilot.

LAWSUIT SCREWS NEWPORT, IRVINE CO.: Daily Pilot - A lawsuit filed by Defend the Bay may totally screw with Newport Beach's plans for a new City Hall. That'll teach 'em to move it off the peninsula. What, you think you're better than the sober-living folk?

• Good Ink for the Sheriff! Norberto Santana Jr. and Tony Saavedra at the Register today find that “a $2 billion effort to deport immigrants has little measurable effect on crime or illegal immigration” and that government agencies “often work at cross purposes.” To prove their point, Santana and Saavedra tell the story of career criminal Juan Gutierrez Bahena, who has been deported to Mexico six times only to return to Orange County to commit additional crimes: burglary, drugs, checking out a young boy showering and indecent exposure of his genitals to a girl. Though Gutierrez Bahena has served prison time, officials usually just ship him to the border. He has no trouble returning. One awkward component of the story: The Reg boys repeatedly quote Sheriff Michael S. Carona, who only agrees to interviews if he knows he’ll be hailed a hero or a victim. And sure enough: the article blames federal prosecutors—the same office prosecuting Carona on public corruption charges including bribery and witness tampering.
• What Day Is it? Oh, any day will do for a chance in Little Saigon to burn a poster of Ho Chi Minh, I guess. Reporter Deepa Bharath found “about 200 people [on Saturday protested] the actions of the Chinese and Vietnamese governments involving a decades-long debate over who owns a cluster of islands in the South China Sea.” Ho Chi Minh has been dead for something like 300 years now, but never mind. The protesters said they hope to influence Vietnam’s commie government to take strong action against China’s commie government which is occupying about 200 oil-rich islands. Somehow they think burning a poster will do the trick.
• Inside Baseball: Michael Miller at the Daily Pilot writes about his 100-year-old newspaper and concludes that through its “rocky, but always colorful, history” it’s “been a mainstay in Newport-Mesa.” Not exactly breaking news, but Miller does a nice job outlining the ups and downs of ownership and the rise of Steve Marble and William Lobdell. They survived difficult years at the paper and later jumped to run the Orange County bureau of the Los Angeles Times. The Times bought the DP in 1993.
-- R. Scott Moxley / OC Weekly

• Sheriff's Lawyer Pal Going to the Slammer: Somehow defense attorney Joe Cavallo—indicted Sheriff Michael S. Carona’s longtime drinking buddy—was able to operate a bail bonds scheme inside Carona’s jail. Hmmm. Wonder how that happened. Any ideas Mikey? Anyhow, yesterday Cavallo (pictured) became the latest in a series of Carona associates to win incarceration. Superior Court Judge Carla M. Singer ordered him to serve six months in jail, which—given his creativity—could prove profitable in the long run. But the 52-year-old won’t have to surrender until March.

  Cavallo became famous in this publication because of his vicious performance defending the Haidl Three, which included Gregory Scott Haidl—the son of Carona’s dirty Assistant Sheriff Don Haidl. (The elder Haidl has acknowledged to federal prosecutors that he’s a crook too.) The three men filmed themselves raping an unconscious 16-year-old girl on a Newport Beach pool table. Before they finished, they laughed as they repeatedly plunged a Snapple bottle, lit cigarette, apple juice can and pool cue into the victim’s vagina and rectum. Cavallo argued in court that the girl was a “slut” and should have been charged with raping the Haidl Three.

  Scorecard: Carona (pictured with a mob-tied contributor at a Newport Beach bar) indicted after an FBI investigation? Check. Carona’s wife indicted? Check. Carona’s top mistress indicted? Check. Carona pal nailed for illegal acts? Check. Carona’s two handpicked assistant sheriff’s convicted of public corruption? Check. Carona's Mafia-tied campaign contributor and party pal convicted? Check.

  Wonder who in Calamity Mike’s clan could be next…



• Rice in China? James Rice was born in Newport Beach, grew up in Costa Mesa, headed the Young Republicans at UCLA in the late 80s, graduated and with nothing but $100 moved to China to teach English. This weekend, the 42-year-old is featured by Don Lee in the LA Times. Why? Not because he speaks fluent Mandarin, commutes between China and California every few weeks and attends a “predominantly black West Angeles Church of God in Christ on Crenshaw Boulevard.” Tyson Foods Inc. uses Rice to sell $200 million worth of chicken annually to communist China. In recent Chinese product scandals, Rice played diplomat between Chinese leaders and the American government, according to Lee who writes from Shanghai.


• Where the hell is Adolf when you need him? This is not a good time to be a white supremacist in OC. Two of their boys are facing one way trips to San Quentin’s death row. On Friday, prosecutor Ebrahim Baytieh announced that he will seek the ultimate punishment against Billy Joe Johnson, the Costa Mesa product who has been featured in this publication. Earlier this year, Johnson—already a convicted killer for ambushing a young man in Huntington Beach with a hammer—claimed on the witness stand that he also executed a fellow member of Public Enemy Number One (PENI) Death Squad. It’s believed in prosecution circles that Johnson made the admission in hopes of blocking convictions against two of his PENI pals in the case. Didn’t work. Jacob Rump and Michael Lamb got roasted. Lamb faces a second DP trial after one jury deadlocked on the issue. Rump is a lifer.

-- R. Scott Moxley / OC Weekly

• Yet Another USC Criminal: Laguna Beach billionaire Igor Olenicoff has pleaded guilty in a massive tax fraud scheme involving $346 million and Bahama bank accounts. A product of USC after fleeing the Soviet Union and Iran, Olenicoff lied to the IRS about the existence of the off shore accounts. He’ll have to pay back taxes and penalties of more than $52 million. He also faces up to three years in a federal prison, although I bet it’s a couple of months if at all.

  Footnote: Igor and his wife Jeanne, who reside in Laguna’s ritzy Emerald Bay, are hoping Mitt Romney wins the White House. They contributed $4,600 (the primary election max) to Mitt in March.



• If there’s no money in the bank, go shopping: Assembly Democrats insist taxes must be raised and are contemplating ways to do it, according to the LA Times. The problem? Our policians have already spent at least $14 billion (or as much as $16 billion) more than they’ve confiscated. The paper says Speaker Fabian Nunez (D-Expensive Excursions) said new tax increases “can generate billions,” especially if he targets internet shopping.

  Meanwhile, Senate President Pro Tem Don Perata (D-Kickbacks) is negotiating “intensely” with Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger for a new $14 billion government healthcare project. Please note that the project would require that everyone in the state pay premiums to insurance companies. Cha Ching!



• Don't You Wish Your Shower Was Hot Like Me? At the same time that the campus fire alarm system remained broken (for two years), a construction crew worked at night to build an expensive private, campus shower for Erlinda Martinez, president of Santa Ana College. This news comes from Reg reporter Marla Jo Fisher, who says “irate” college trustees—including Phil Yarbrough and John Hanna--stopped the project. $11,000 had already been spent. Because she says she stinks by the end of the work day and likes to attend evening functions, Martinez thought it’d be a good idea to have a convenient cleansing location. She apologized for “clearly” not anticipating “the perception or the community reaction to this.”


• OC Pols lost nearly $14 million last month: Christian Berthelsen of the Times reports that trouble is brewing in Orange County's investment porfolio. A “Nov. 30 warning by Moody's Investors Service that it might downgrade $460 million in securities held by Orange County forced the treasurer's office to write down their value by nearly $13.8 million,” according to Berthelsen. And who is helping lose the public funds? Our good ole pals at Merrill Lynch & Co. who robbed us blind while driving OC into a $1.6 billion bankruptcy in 1994. Our wise leaders are once again paying the company big fees for advice. Berthelsen provided another big surprise: an on-the-mark observation from usually bumbling ex-Supe Jim Silva, who said, “Merrill Lynch has never really been a friend to the county, if you look at their history.”


• Best Headline of the Day: From the Seattle Times: “Suitcase full of cash wasn’t for her, says Argentine president.”

-- R. Scott Moxley / OC Weekly

• California's New Math: The LA Times reports today that state prison officials miscalculated the sentences for not 25 or 50 or 100 but for 33,000 current inmates. According to judges, officials have been applying the "wrong formula." Writes reporter Michael Rothfeld, "The sentencing errors range from a few days to several years." California's chief deputy secretary for adult prison operations gave Rothfeld the money quote: "We believe it's a problem." Recognition is the first step, I guess. But prison industrial complex officials say the answer isn't to fire incompetent managers. Nope. They say the answer is to let them hire 85 new staffers.
• Alex, I'll take Verbs for $600: Chris Caesar at the Daily Pilot decided to put everything he knew in one sentence, so take deep, deep breath and read:

  "Rep. Dana Rohrabacher backpedaled Wednesday on comments he made this week that accused the Congressional Hispanic Caucus of lobbying to hold up a non-binding Congressional resolution calling on President Bush to pardon two Border Patrol agents convicted of shooting a drug smugger in the buttocks."



• Hey Sheep, They're Wasting Your Dough: Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, the man who once guaranteed he'd clean up California's spending mess, is admitting that the state's looming budget deficit has jumped from $6 billion to more than $16 billion. (For state prison officials, here's the math: that's a $10 billion increase.) Democrats running the legislature and Schwarzenegger are all smiles, but this obscenity has the Register Opinion folks rightly steaming. In a column today, they write, "We hope Sacramento wakes up to the real blame behind the looming financial catastrophe – profligate spending beyond means, motivated by an over-reaching do-goodism, rather than trusting people to do good with their own money." Bingo.


• Man Behind the Blog: KDOC's Daybreak OC today celebrated Matt Cunningham's RedCounty.com Republican blog. Cunningham told the show's Pete Weitzner (pictured) that he's been successful because he says "things people think but nobody wants to say." I guess it's that ole, Nixon era "Silent Majority" line. By the way, the folks at Daybreak, a relatively new news show, have worked out early kinks (except for nagging audio issues) and are delivering a greatly improved broadcast. I especially liked their interview with sheriff's spokesman Jim Amormino, who has a way with words my southern heart loves. He said "con-fee-dent."


-- R. Scott Moxley / OC Weekly

• Did Carona Create Yet Another Monster? If I was indicted Sheriff Michael S. Carona, I might be getting tired of Jo Ann Galisky, Kool-Aid Queen. This acting sheriff bit has swelled her mullet. Six weeks after she became temporary head honcho, she's still telling everyone she can that Carona's absence "has had no impact" at the Orange County Sheriff's Department. Galisky (pictured busy at work) barked the line again yesterday, according to Peggy Lowe at the Register. Galisky's wrong again. At a minimum, dozens of married, slightly overweight, emotionally-needy, low-level female department employees are safe from sexual harassment at work. Lowe also reports that county counsel told the board of supervisors that they are powerless to alter Carona's self-imposed paid-leave absence. Board Chairman Chris Norby then declared Carona "still sheriff in every sense of the word," which is a funny thought given that our indicted top lawman is spending his days trying to get folks to participate in his coverup hopes. Oh, sure. I'm kidding. Mikey wouldn't do that himself. Cowards always get slap-happy morons to do their dirty work.
• I've done something terrible: Jeffrey Ray Nielsen--the Orange County Republican activist pedophile and ex-Dana Rohrabacher aide--finally admitted he's guilty of pleasuring himself sexually with a 12-year-old Virginia boy and a Westminster high school freshman boy. You've read the pathetic tales here. But some folks at the Register are disturbed by my Nielsen coverage. In my most recent story a week ago, I noted that the Reg had celebrated Nielsen as a compassionate hero allegedly saving homeless kittens from the Katrina disaster WITHOUT EVER MENTIONING THAT HE WAS AT THE TIME AN ACCUSED PEDOPHILE. "Nowhere did [our story] mention kittens," read an email from a staffer. Yep, it was homeless puppies the paper claimed Nielsen was aiding WITHOUT EVER MENTIONING THAT HE WAS AT THE TIME AN ACCUSED PEDOPHILE. I apologize for my error. [Editor's note: Actually, our story did say puppies, not kittens. So we're right, and they're wrong. Again.]
• Christian Broadcasting Network Finds OC "War": Pat Robertson's CBN folks went looking for villains and found--oh, Jesus, no--"homosexuals" once again. Of course, it's not good enough that the Sodomites want equal protection under the law. According to CBN, they've cleverly infiltrated schools as teachers and want to wear dresses to work. If a student voices opposition to the garments, they'll be sued by the homosexual teacher, according to Jose Gonzales, "a concerned Orange County resident." Gonzales told CBN, "We're in the middle of a big culture war and what's at stake right now is the traditional family." Jose, please let me know when the first lawsuit is filed.
-- R. Scott Moxley / OC Weekly

• Piggy Bank time! Rudy Giuliani will be in San Juan Capistrano this afternoon for private fund raiser (which his people tell us will be closed to the press). The Washington Post reports that Giuliani's OC trips have been happy ones thus far. He's picked up $98,250 from Newport Coast, $273,388 from Newport Beach, $109,277 from Irvine, $62,450 from Laguna Beach, $41,350 from Orange and then some.
• Sick Fuck: Both the Times and Register have the worst story of the day: Woman in her 20s crawls out of her car -rendered inoperable after hitting a barrier on the I-5 freeway shoulder near San Juan Capistrano. Woman calls a friend for help when a man pulls over and offers to help. She says no thanks. He throws her cellphone to the ground and rapes her, then drives off. How he got away with that on the heavily-trafficked freeway is beyond the sheriff's department.
• Can't please everybody anybody: The Daily Pilot talks to folks for and against rehab housing in Newport Beach, and neither side is pleased with the new rules the city is proposing to curb the spread of such facilities in the area. Anti-rehab home activists are threatening to sue the city for millions if more isn't done, while rehab home operators plan to put up a fight if the rules are implemented. The Reg detailed the rules last week.
• The things they carried...and lost: Ever wondered where the things left on OCTA buses end up? Here's an item we missed from yesterday's LAT.

• Cracking down on rehab homes: Newport Beach is getting stricter with the city's dozens of oceanside sober-living and drug-treatment houses and plans to unveil a set of rules "designed to eliminate the deleterious effects on the character of the neighborhoods" today. Residents unnerved by this recent development are expected to show up at a Tuesday meeting. (Druggies and alcoholics fighting for their rights... should be quite a show!) Mayor Steve Rosansky says he won't be surprised if legal challenges pop up from rehab home companies, reports the Register.
• "Froyo" wars and reverse publishing: Register foodie blogger Nancy Luna blogged about Cold Stone Creamery creating a product to compete with the frozen yogurt market last month. Today, the slightly expanded story made it into print.
• Scams for the rich and stupid: What kind of idiot falls for a face-to-face version of the popular "help, I'm loaded with foreign currency but can't transfer the dough and need YOU to lend me money which I will return when I'm finally able do do something with these worthless millions. . ." e-mail scam? More than one guy in Irvine, apparently.
• Garden Grove deaths: On Sunday, Garden Grove police shot Trinidad Ornelas, an allegedly unarmed schizophrenic man, to death, reports the Times. The cops say they found Ornelas choking his mother in the front yard. Meanwhile, the Daily Pilot reports that OC coroners have identified the unclothed, tatted body found in the Santa Ana River last Saturday as Marvin Alexander Ceron, 30, of Garden Grove. Investigators still aren't sure how the body got there.

• Story of the day goes to Christian Berthelsen at the Times for his piece on Chriss Street:

  "In 1994, Chriss Street was hailed as a hero for helping to blow the whistle on high-risk holdings in Orange County's investment portfolio, presaging the largest municipal bankruptcy filing in U.S. history. But now, in his year-old role as the county's treasurer, Street finds himself in the awkward position of having to defend some of his investment decisions. Street made a startling presentation to the Orange County Board of Supervisors this week, warning that $460 million in debt securities the county holds face a potential credit-rating downgrade -- raising the possibility that the county could lose money on them. . ."

  
  We especially like the way Berthelsen set the scene at this week's Board of Supes meeting, with Street making like a gadfly and presenting during the public comment session.



• Nice try, Debbie: Over at Total Buzz, Peggy Lowe reports that the feds have filed a motion against Mrs. Carona's attempt to escape the case against her husband. The sheriff's wife wanted more information in order to begin “extricating” herself from the indictment, but the feds aren't giving her any of that. U.S. Attorney Brett Sagel says she’s been "'fully and fairly' apprised of the charges she faces."


• Anaheim abandons the dream? The LAT reports that Anaheim is selling the large chunk of city-owned land in the Angel Stadium parking lot that was being eyed as a possible home for a SoCal NFL team.


• Weird new-ish Register blog: Have the folks at the Reg become so indecisive about what goes on page one? Apparently, mid-November they launched a blog called the "Front Page" where readers can vote for stories they'd like to see the next day. Doesn't appear to be too popular, though, if the number of voters (or lack thereof) is any indication. . .

• What do Mike Carona and Rudy Giuliani have in common? Ties to former cocaine smuggler Florida billionaire Hank Asher, reports ABC News: Asher, aka H.A. in the indictment, allegedly gave Carona's wife (and former Assistant Sheriff George Jaramillo's wife) a $15,000 diamond-studded gold Cartier watch. "Asher is not charged with any crime in the indictment. But his expensive gifts are clearly part of the corruption investigation," writes ABC's Richard Esposito. Giuliani and Asher have been partners with the Mayo Clinic in Jari Research, "a business set on finding a bone marrow cancer cure and making a profit" since 2005. Peggy Lowe finds more connections over at Total Buzz.
• Speaking of Carona. . . What part of "leave of absence" doesn't His Indictedness understand? Carona agreed to step down on Nov. 6. Now, the Register notes that he was spotted -in full uniform no less- at a graduation ceremony on Nov. 15 at Rio Hondo Police Academy, "where one Orange County Sheriff’s recruit received his badge." Read The Liberal OC's thoughts on the matter.
• OC blogger ousted from Santa Ana panel: The Santa Ana City Council couldn't take the criticism Thomas Gordon was dishing out on the Orange Juice Blog. So they kicked him off the anti-gang commission. Since then, co-bloggers Art Pedroza and Luis Rodriguez have resigned from the Santa Ana Housing & Redevelopment Commission. Coverage: Times, Register. (Note: we named Orange Juice best local blog this year.)
• Sinking feeling: Remember that chilling Titanic-esque photo that was splashed across the front page of the Times late November? Eli Charne of Irvine was on the red-hulled Explorer ship the day it hit the iceberg in Antarctica. He tells the LAT his tale.
• In case you missed it: Check out R.Scott Moxley's web exclusive update on Jeffrey Ray Nielsen.

• Janet Nguyen to pay up: OC's newest supervisor recently admitted to collecting funds above the legal limit in the last election and trying to avoid disclosing them. Nguyen has agreed to pay $5,000 to settle state and county investigations into a legal-defense fun she improperly set up (and made $12,500 in donations with) -- improper because such funds aren't allowed for county candidates, reports Martin Wisckol at the Reg.
• It's raining war cash: Ceradyne Inc., which manufactures ceramic body armor out of Costa Mesa, has won a $107-million contract from the Army for plates to be used in protective vests, reports the Daily Pilot.
• New disciplinary tactics at Brea school: Brian Christopher Wilcher, a teacher at Brea Junior High has been arrested for allegedly threatening to kill a disruptive seventh grader. The cops say that Wilcher told a 12-year-old boy "something to the effect that 'next semester you'd better find another teacher because if you're in my class I'm going to kill you.' "
• Supposed police informant kidnapped, beaten: Kamran Mashayekhi, a 66-year-old chauffeur who says he's helped the Anaheim police solve crimes by passing along tidbits overheard from the backseat, says he was kidnapped and bludgeoned for his trouble. The cops would not confirm that Mashayekhi was their man, but arrested Gilbert Carrillo of Buena Park Monday on charges of robbing and imprisoning Mashayekhi. "You help the police and when they are done with you, they wash you off," Mashayekhi told the Times.

• Need a Carona/Haidl primer? Paul Pringle and Christine Hanley provide one in today's Times. Or you could just skim the Moxley archives.
• Flying (and crashing) solo: An OC sheriff's deputy crashed his cruiser into a tree on an on-ramp to the I-405 in Seal Beach early this morning. The Register reports that the deputy was not responding to a call at the time of the accident, and no other cars were involved. A CHP investigation is underway.
• On OCWeekly.com: Weekly photog. Christopher Victorio boarded the USS Rushmore in Seal Beach Saturday. Check out his snaps of the warship here.
• In case you missed it: Read this week's LA Weekly cover story by political cartoonist Mr. Fish (aka Dwayne Booth). In it, he details a disastrous interview with presidential peace candidate Rep. Dennis Kucinich. Kucinich is a complete dipshit to Booth, but somehow ends up being deemed the best person for the job. Aside: Damn Booth for not only being able to write a killer story, but for doing the cover art and inside illustrations too.

• Bishop Brown citation dropped: The Los Angeles Times reports that a contempt-of-court citation against Orange Bishop Tod Brown has been dropped as part of an almost-$7 million sex abuse settlement. Plaintiff's attorney John Manly said the diocese forced them to drop their bid for the citation: "The diocese insisted that it be done this way or they would have refused to pay our clients." But Diocese of Orange attorney Peter Callahan, in typical Callahan form, said the contempt case was dismissed by the court because it "lacked merit." Gustavo Arellano blogs the hell out of the Orange sex abuse scandal often enough - check out his Ex Cathedra archive here.
• Late to the dance again: The Register plays catch-up with the Times on yesterday's Debbie Carona story. Kind of like the way they did when the indictment story broke last month.
• Sea lion stabber fesses up: The jerk who stabbed a sea lion with a steak knife through the heart in Newport Beach last July has a name - Hai Nguyen. CBS News reports that he was fishing off a NB pier when the creature snatched the bait from his line. Nguyen told a federal magistrate that he never meant to kill the sea lion, just scare it away, y'know, with a knife. He faces up to a year in prison and a $20,000 fine.
• Lost and Found: A San Clemente mother was reported missing earlier in the month and has yet to be found. Heather Lynn Gould left her two children, purse and IDs home on Oct. 15. Her fiancee waited three weeks to file a missing persons report in the hopes she would return. Meanwhile, the 65-year-old Anaheim guy with Alzheimer's who wandered away from a hospital Monday was found safe yesterday at a shopping center on Euclid Street.
• Best rumor ever: Britney Spears? At our upcoming Christmas party?! Wonder who cooked that one up. . .

• More dirt on Debbie? Yesterday we noted that Debbie Carona was doing her darndest to wriggle her way out of a case that's mainly against her husband. Wait a second, missy. Today, Christine Hanley and Garrett Therolf at the Times report that the sheriff's wife urged Orange County Fair Board directors to support a swap meet operator who donated thousands to her husband's political campaigns despite a proposal from rival firm. Hanley and Therolf are having tons of fun poking around the Costa Mesa fair grounds for dirt on Debbie, who sits on the fair board. Earlier in the month, they reported that the owners of the Giant Paintball Park (which is currently on the fair grounds) paid the Caronas $25,000 for their help in landing such a primo paintballing spot.
• Fire season still on in OC: The National Weather Service has declared a red-flag warning from 3 a.m. to 6 p.m. in Orange County's canyons today. The Santa Anas are expected to reach 55 mph in eastern OC today while humidity drops to 10-15 percent.
• Game over: Disney wins its war on cheap housing near its Anaheim resort, report the Times and Register. As expected, the Anaheim City Council voted yesterday to withdraw its support of the proposed housing project near the park.
• Injured joggers win big: Two ladies who became quadriplegic after being struck by a car in a Dana Point bike lane in 2006 are getting $50 million from the city for their pains. The hit-and-run driver, William Todd Bradshaw, is serving four years in prison.

• Debbie Carona wants out: On Halloween day, the Weekly sat in a crowded Santa Ana courtroom and watched the odd trio of sheriff, wife and mistress twitching as they sat cuffed and in uncomfortably close quarters. Debbie Carona sat a lawyer away from her hubby and did not so much as look at him the entire time, though she seemed obsessed with the room's double doors. That chick wanted out and by George, she's working on it. Peggy Lowe at the Register reports that Mrs. Carona has asked that prosecutors specifically outline the case against her so she can begin “extricating” herself. Out of the 65 criminal acts detailed in the indictment, she's named in just seven and faces only one count of conspiracy.
• Hillary is coming to town: Madame Clinton will be speaking 1:15 p.m. Thursday at the annual Global Summit on AIDS and the Church at Saddleback Church in Lake Forest on a panel called "The Global P.E.A.C.E. Plan: Conversations with Leaders." She'll be joined by the guy some call the, er, "world's sexiest preacher." Other presidential hopefuls have been invited, and Martin Wisckol at the Register reports that four lazy louts have said they'd send a video instead of showing up in person.
• Story we didn't want to click on: Tree trimmer in Cerritos pinned and killed on the job.
• Taking it back at 5? The whole Disney housing hulaballoo may end this afternoon when Anaheim's City Council meets. The council is expected to repeal its decision to allow residential development near the resort area. Agenda here.

• Preparing for deportation: In the past fiscal year, Immigration and Customs Enforcement made almost twice as many arrests (30,396) in its fugitive operations program as it did the previous year, reports the Register. ICE also picked up more than 4,000 illegals in workplace raids - up 11 percent from 2006. The increase in raids have immigration rights advocates urging families to plan for a deportation. On the to-do list: "taking care of property records and finances and making clear plans for who will care for children if U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement arrests caretakers."
• Wanna be on the OC Grand Jury? Is reviewing the work of local government agencies for $50/day your idea of a good time? Then sign up for the 2008-2009 Orange County Grand Jury. The Superior Court of Orange County is accepting applications now. Details here.
• Shaky ground for the mayor-who-would-be-governor: Last year, many Cal Dems saw Los Angeles mayor Antonio Villaraigosa as the likely heir to Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger's throne. But the mayor's botched attempts to take over the school district and his hand-in-the-cookie jar affair with former Telemundo reporter Mirthala Salinas have pushed him down the list of gov. would-bes, reports Duke Helfand at the Times. Others on that list: Atty. Gen. Jerry Brown, Lt. Gov. John Garamendi, state Treasurer Bill Lockyer, San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom (who has his own brand of extramarital dirt), former Controller Steve Westly and Supt. of Public Instruction Jack O'Connell.
• From Black Friday to Cyber Monday: Not sick of shopping yet? The Register's retail blog has a list of sites listing today-only web deals.
• Food for thought: "Why do people — gay or straight — need the state’s permission to marry?" history professor Stephanie Coontz wonders aloud in today's NYT Op-Ed section. For most of Western history, that wasn't necessary, writes Coontz.

• New! Improved! And sort of the same! "New Web strategy" reads one of the Register's headlines in that little rotating box on the paper's website (yes, next to the turkey and pumpkin pie photos). But click it and you get this, which doesn't sound like it veers away from the current setup much:

  Local: We will be the essential source of news and information about Orange County. This is the core of what we stand for at the Register.

  Digital: We will provide you with relevant local news in a real-time way throughout the day. We will use every venue at our disposal to get you the news when you need it.

  Video/Photo: We will bring you the sights and sounds of Orange County as the go-to source for photos and videos that capture our shared experiences.

  
  That's all great, guys, but where's the "new" bit?



• GOP to ask Carona to step down? Well, not really. No, the county republicans aren't jumping on that bandwagon just yet. The Reg reports that they've "launched a process" to determine whether or not to consider asking the sheriff to resign. Hurrah for men of action!


• Blandest headline of the day goes to the Press-Telegram for this unoriginal news peg: "L.B. homeowners to be warned."


• Return of the devil winds: The Santa Anas are expected to whip through the county later in the week. The Times notes that it may be to windy for that California-style outdoor Thanksgiving meal.


• Stealing Irvine's spotlight: In June, Irvine was deemed America's safest city. But now another OC city has snatched the title: Mission Viejo.

• $50 million Eskimo Pie: Because its priests and missionaries sexually abused 110 Eskimo children from 1961 to 1987, the Jesuit order of the Roman Catholic Church has almost finalized a deal to pay $50 million to the victims, William Lobdell and Stuart Silverstein report in today’s LA Times. But “the settlement does not require the order to admit fault” and “more than a dozen” priests escaped criminal charges, according to the article. “Many plaintiffs said their once devoutly Catholic villages -- cut off from the world and without law enforcement -- offered a perfect setting for a molesting priest,” write Lobdell and Silverstein.
• Look! Up in the Sky! It’s Super Schroeder: Allen Bartlett at the Powder Blue Report and Steven Greenhut at the Register think the Orange County GOP Central Committee meeting should be “a doozy” because Cypress Mayor Mike McGill is expected to offer a resolution calling for an STD examination for indicted Sheriff Michael S. Carona. I jest, Mikey. McGill wants the central committee to ask Carona to step aside following FBI revelations about brides and obstruction of justice. Of course, this will require deft defensive moves by Carona consigliere and GOP powerbroker Mike "Darth Vader" Schroeder (pictured out of uniform). But according to McGill’s resolution, “The sheriff’s own conduct, coupled with the serious federal charges against him and the pending trial, provide a significant distraction to the sheriff in the performance of his duties and ability to serve Orange County.”
• Meanwhile, back at the ranch: Chris Prevatt at theliberaloc.com published his interview with chief Carona Kool-Aid drinker, Jo Ann Galisky, who is temporarily running the Orange County Sheriff’s Department. Poor Jo Ann (pictured with drink in hand). “If I do not speak with reporters and answer their questions, they will suppose that I have something to hide,” she told Prevatt. “When I answer their questions truthfully, I’m accused of being a shill for Sheriff Carona.” Cause you are a shill, honey. Galisky goes on to spin that the media “frenzy” on Carona’s corruption woes is an attack on the “hard working men and women” of the OCSD. Gulp. Gulp. Gulp. Poor Mikey too. Here’s Prevatt: ”I asked Galisky if the Sheriff’s current leave of absence has had any effect on the day to day operations of the department. ‘Not really,’ she replied.” Ouch.
• Hanoiville? Times reporter My-Thuan Tran writes that San Jose’s Vietnamese district is attempting to re-market itself and is struggling to name itself. Here’s Tran:

  One group strongly pushed for "Saigon" to be in the name (as in "Little Saigon" or "New Saigon") as a tribute to the fallen capital of South Vietnam. Others wanted "Vietnam" included (such as "Vietnamtown" or "Vietnamese Business District"), which rankled the pro-Saigon groups that say such a name would glorify the communist country.

  
  Some of those who want “Saigon” in the name say anyone who opposes them is a communist sympathizer.

  Yawn.

-- R. Scott Moxley / OC Weekly

• Dana Point Gets a Celebrity! Earvin “Magic” Johnson and his wife, Cookie, have purchased a $7.6 million gated-community “vacation” home in Dana Point, according to the Times. Though “Hot Property” reporter Ruth Ryon didn’t share more details about the location, you can assume it’s at the oceanfront Headlands, property owned for decades by the Chandler family, longtime owners of Ryon’s employer. Anyhow, real estate agent Shelley Brown told the paper that Johnson, who lives most of the time in Beverly Hills, likes Dana Point more than Malibu. The 7,700-square-foot, ocean-view house holds five bedrooms, seven baths, a deck, wine cellar, home theatre, elevator and a pool, writes Ryon.
• A Hero In Our Midst: Peggy Lowe at the Register wins story of the day ("Competitive Juices Fuel Carona Prosecutor") with her exclusive interview with Brett Sagel, the assistant U.S. Attorney who is bravely prosecuting Calamity Mike (our frisky, money-loving, justice-bending sheriff) on a series of corruption charges. (Note to Reg: please don't use "juices" in headlines related to this sheriff.) Sagel, 33, declined to speak about his case against Mike Carona, but provided a nice little bio: St. Louis native who loves poker, eats vegetarian, votes Republican despite the efforts of his mother and uses words like “awesome.” An interesting tidbit buried in the story focused on Wayne R. Gross, until recently the chief of the U.S. Attorney’s Office in Santa Ana. He’s now in private practice, thankfully. Law enforcement sources have long told me that Gross wouldn’t prosecute criminals in OC’s power structure because he wants a high political office or judgeship. You’d hope that sort of slime wouldn’t be true, but then in Lowe’s story Gross—a fan of Carona consigliere Michael Schroeder--noted that he had to recuse himself from the probe because he was too close to Carona. Comforting, huh? I'm betting Gross will wear a black robe soon.
• Rush Limbaugh 101: Mike Anton and Garrett Therolf of the Times report that UCI law school dean Erwin Chemerinsky has already won $100,000 commitments from 11 large law firms, $1 million each from the Clarke Foundation and local lawyer Mark Robinson, a Democrat, plus $20 million from OC’s impersonation of Howard Hughes, reclusive billionaire Donald Bren of Newport Beach. Some local conservatives had claimed Chemerinsky’s appointment would destroy the school set to open in 2009. Their argument went something like this: Chemerinsky is liberal. Liberals are biased. Hire a conservative as dean. Conservatives have no bias.
-- R. Scott Moxley / OC Weekly