Of all my duties as editorial assistant here at the OC Weekly, I have to say that my favorite is answering the telephone calls for the editorial department.
From random story ideas to PR pitches and the incessant ranting of crazy persons, I have heard it all. Here are a few of my favorite calls from this week:
Breaking News! A man left a voice mail with this hot story tip. His son’s private school wouldn’t allow the boy to attend a field trip because he failed to turn in some paperwork on time. “He was absent the day it was due!” the recording said. “This just isn’t right! They are out of control there… They made me get a doctor’s note for him to be allowed to wear a jacket during PE!” I have a thought. Why don’t you stop paying for you child to go to school there?
A man called from some PR agency to ask what local “controversial issues” were going on in Orange County. Jeez, I don’t know… Why don’t you read the paper and find out?
Best call of the week! A woman who identified herself as the wife of a police officer called to complain for 10 minutes about the ads listed in the back of our free weekly publication. She defined the ads as “obscene” and announced that she fears for the safety of the young Orange County populous. “Won’t someone please think of the children?” she pleaded. “I am going to bring your paper up at the County Supervisor’s meeting for printing this pornographic material!” she threatened. “Your paper WILL be shut down!” She has been reading the paper for years, you see, and apparently the ads have just taken a trip down Slumsville Boulevard. I mean there are pictures in there of shirtless men hugging for God’s sake.
I really like my job and I can tell that everyone else in editorial is super jealous of my awesome telephone conversations. These calls serve as the chocolate topping on my daily-duty sundae. Don’t you want to be the next lucky person put a cherry on top? Call in and add to the glee with a rant of your own. Who knows, you might even get blogged about.
