It's always entertaining to see which sacrificial lamb the Orange County Republican Party offers to Congresswoman Loretta Sanchez every two years, but the 2008 election is already proving to be particularly fun. Running unopposed as the Republican nominee for the 47th Congressional District is Santa Ana Unified School District Trustee Rosemarie Avila, whom we'll always remember for telling her pastor, Calvary Chapel's Chuck Smith, that her school district was planning to become the first in Orange County to offer benefits for same-sex couples. Smith, in turn, told his zombies to complain--and, oh, did they.

Enough about the past. On May 28, Avila will speak before the converted at the California Coalition for Immigration Reform. As part of the promotion, CCIR links to an ad paid for by Friends of Rosie Avila touting their candidate. Amongst many hilarious assertions (Avila was hardly the main catalyst behind the 2004 Nativo Lopez recall) is this: that Avila "regularly appears on FOX NEWS, CNN, ABC, cable television and radio talk shows as a trusted source of information."

Or, does she?

Santa Ana police spokesman Jose Gonzales says a multi-police agency force of about 185 officers, some just on standby, were on duty to keep the peace as an expected 6,000 people were to march for immigrant rights downtown.

But when the event actually went down, there were nearly as many cops and media as there were protesters, making the whole thing seem overblown and underwhelming.

Where were the marchers? Only about 500 actually showed up. The Weekly was there getting video, which we should have up tomorrow (due to technical glitches) catching the entire event—uneventful as it was.

It seemed that not even the anti-immigrant protesters, usually very predictable and outspoken, cared enough to show up (at least we didn't see them). Only one lone Minuteman was on hand, the ever watchful (if slow-moving) Border Raven, Gerry Nance, spewing stuff about how if the immigrants were to stumble on dead bodies during their crossing the border, might they turn back? I was only half paying attention, mostly occupied with wondering where everyone was.

It seems that since just a few years ago, when tens of thousands and thousands of people flooded the streets causing traffic backup for miles and miles, there just isn't a lot of enthusiasm anymore. I mean, the weather was perfect, what gives?

Taina Reyes, an Orange County activist, chalked it up to the fear created by incessant raids by Immigration and Customs Enforcement, or ICE, but it's hard to buy that argument. I doubt ICE would want the kind of publicity that would come from rounding up innocent people who were out exercising their First Amendment rights.

But, on a positive note, it was peaceful and pleasant. The police presence was very courteous and professional (hey, the cameras were rolling), and felt more like an escort than anything. So for anyone hoping for bedlam, conflict and intrigue, from what I saw, there was nothing there. Maybe next year.

Tomorrow is May Day, celebrated by socialists across the globe and by illegal immigrants in the United States to march for amnesty (as an Aztlanista, I can tell you the shared dates ain't no coincidence, I tell ustedes what). Locally, pro-amnesty folks will meet at SanTana's Civic Center Plaza at 2 p.m., while the loyal opposition known as the California Coalition for Immigration Reform will protest outside the Mexican Consulate off Broadway and Civic Center Drive at eight in the morn.

Of course, a CCIR rally isn't a CCIR rally without a wacko ramble by their president, Barbara Coe (pictured). Rather than leave nasty commentary, I present it below in its unvarnished, Know Nothing brilliance:

Since we all know our mainstream media will NOT report the truth and WILL spin their reports in favor of the illegal alien criminals marching in our streets AND all first-hand reports are so appreciated, CCIR urges you all to practice "Safety First"!
Film the marches and conduct interviews discreetly and say nothing that will incite violence toward you. Some of these "marchers" are violent criminals and with the march "hysteria" , will use any excuse to physically attack you.
At least in the Los Angeles CA area, DO NOT, repeat, DO NOT count on local law enforcement personnel to protect you as
LA Mayor Villar and LAPD Chief Bratton have made their commitment to protect "the rights" of the illegal aliens - they have made NO commitment to protect the rights of law-abiding Americans!
o Work within a group or at least with a partner - o Have your cell phone on and ready to make a 911 call at all times. YOUR reports are invaluable but not at the cost of YOUR life - Be aware, take care and God bless and protect each & every PATRIOT who has the courage to record this illegal alien invasion event!

La Opinión had a fascinating front-page piece yesterday about kiddies at Creek View Elementary School in Ontario regaling each other with a rhyme that translates as, "I don't want to go to Mexico ever again, again, again/Mexico stinks, stinks, stinks/There's a fat policeman at the door, door, door." Parents and school officials are flipping out, and La Opinión even interviews some psychologist who warns that "the danger" of such a chant toward a student's self-esteem "can be profound." Even crazier is the comments of one Herlinda Donis, president of the Los Angeles Unified School District's Parent's Cooperative. "We have cases of kids that, from 4 years old onward, are embarrassed to say they're from Mexico, and if in their own schools they hear insults toward their country [Gustavo's note: um, your child's in America, chula: hope you meant "ethnicity"], then this child will definitely grow up with enormous trauma," Donis freaks to Opinión reporter Claudia Nuñez. "No one should permit that something like this should happen."

Do these same parents ever raise a fuss when their kids chant, as every Mexican kid has chanted in history, "Chino, chino, japonés: come caca y no me des"? Doubt it--but I digress. Not only is the Smelly Mexico chant silly in a schoolyard type of way, it's also doesn't rank high in the history of American schoolyard taunts--definitely no "Smear the Queer." For instance, back when I attended Thomas Jefferson Elementary in Anaheim during the 1980s, all the kids liked to play La Migra, which involved one group of kids acting as Border Patrol agents, another acting as illegal immigrants, and someone shouting "LA MIGRA!!!" to start a mestizaje of hide-and-go-seek and tag. Thomas Jefferson was super-majority Latino by that point, so we'd often have the few white kids play Mexicans, and Mexicans play the migra. No one's sense of self-esteem was harmed, although we suffered more than a few scraped knees.

If the Creek View kids who uttered the Smelly Mexico rhyme were white kids using it to beat up on Mexicans, I'd see the need for alarm. But it seems that it's Mexican kids using it amongst themselves. Indeed, one Mexican second-grader told Nuñez, "Here, almost all the kids sing it. It's just a song!" I haven't taken psychology since my freshman year at Orange Coast College, but it seems the Smelly Mexico rhyme is a way for the Mexis to deal with racism (the fat policeman is the border guard, not returning to Mexico signifies a fear of deportation, and the Mexico stinks line is a satirical reappropriation of Know Nothing rhetoric) similar to the traditional use of fairy tales to teach kids about life's depravities. Of course, such simple logic isn't going to placate the PC pendejos at the Mountain View School District (under whose jurisdiction Creek View falls), which promises to investigate the situation and stop the kiddies from being kiddies.

You'll be hard-pressed to ever find two sides in a lawsuit less sympathetic than the parties who are scheduled to show up in Orange County Superior Court on May 27. On one side will stand Minuteman Project founder Jim Gilchrist, who was fired last year from the organization he founded for accusations of fraud, embezzlement and other such financial shenanigans; supporting him will be Tim "I Want to Kill Muslims When I Grow Up" Bueler. Suing him on the above charges are current Minuteman Project board members Deborah Courtney and Marvin Stewart; their supporters include Brook "Fabulous Soul Patch" Young and California Coalition for Immigration Reform leader Barbara Coe. The charges, counter-charges, and counter-counter-charges are wild, outlandish, so schaudenfreude--read Gilchrist's account and Young's take, and don't forget to wear some tin foil!

Gilchrist must be worried about his coming court date, because he filed a defamation lawsuit against Young, Courtney, Stewart, Coe and other Know Nothings earlier this week in Orange County Superior Court. The retired Aliso Viejo CPA alleges Young defamed him by posting a picture on his ImmigrationWatchdog.com website with the words "Fraud," claims each of the defendants posted his home address and driver's license picture on web sites, and that these and other dirty tricks "constitute oppression."

Both sides of this lawsuit have tried to get me to write about the other by feeding me info on their enemies (lawsuits make strange bedfellows, eh?), but I never bothered with the tips--partly because I was too busy with Catholic Church stuff but mostly because I relish seeing the two turn the once-vaunted Minuteman Project into an effort as bicker-filled as MEChA. However, let me take off my Aztlanista glasses for a second and (gasp!) agree with Young: Gilchrist's lawsuit seems strangely timed (you two funboys have been at it for a good half-year, so why file now, Jim?) and probably even juts into SLAPP territory. Regardless, make sure to take some tacos whenever these two end up in court and enjoy the fiesta!

For a preview of what's to come, check out this recent confrontation between Gilchrist and his antagonists:

It must be nigh-impossible for the nicotine-stained brain of California Coalition for Immigration Reform president Barbara Coe to keep up with all the conspiracies (Reconquista, evil Muslims, the Cult of the Two Blue Shoes) she subscribes to. Nevertheless, we always dismissed her efforts and rambles as those of a bitter, hate-filled woman--until this weekend, when we received proof of Coe's beyond-the-pale mind from Babs herself.

On April 5, Coe forwarded a story to her group that interviewed one Ted Gunderson. He claims to have found proof that former Palm Springs congressman Sonny Bono didn't die in a skiing accident in 1998 but was murdered for knowing too much.

Coe praised Bono to CCIR members in her forwarded message as "an outspoken American patriot who worked tirelessly to halt the illegal alien invasion of our nation AND focused his efforts on halting illegal aliens bringing drugs and weapons into the U.S." and said a CCIR member "shared his belief that Sonny was murdered and begged for an investigation" but was "ignored by both the mainstream media and members of Congress."

"Ted Gunderson is a highly respected former FBI agent who is known for not opening his mouth until he has the FACTS! YOU DECIDE!" Coe wrote. "And do I care whether or not this has been 'confirmed by SNOPES' - No, I do not as I am sharing breaking news AND background data!"

Who is Gunderson? Thought you'd never ask!

Few groups have provided a better glimpse into Orange County conservatism's evil, noxious soul like the California Coalition for Immigration Reform, which has provided the Weekly with much fodder over the years. CCIR head Barbara Coe and her minions usually go after illegal aliens (read: Mexicans), so it was nice to see Babs also hates Muslims as well--and she makes no distinction between legal and illegal Muslims, terrorist or non-terrorist Muslims. Just Muslims.

Last Thursday, Coe sent out a mass email to her group forwarding this Snopes-worthy list of Islam's sins. "Please read!," she screeched (even in her emails, Coe sounds like a crow). "I have just read "The Haj" by Leon Uris which reveals the pure EVIL instilled (from birth) within those who worship Allah and comply with the teachings of the Koran (torture, maim, murder all 'infidels'). And this is what Pres. Bush calls a 'religion of peace' and urged us to welcome them into our communities? We can only wonder how many mosques are, in reality, 'terrorist cells'?"

We're not really surprised about Coe's feelings: after all, it was CCIR who once hosted a high schooler who said he wanted to kill Muslims for a living upon graduation. That high schooler was Tim Bueler, longtime spokesman for the Minuteman Project. But Babs can no longer claim she's just against illegal aliens--she's also against about one-sixth of humanity. Good luck with that, Babs!

With apologies to Orange County Register sports genius Randy Youngman, notes, quotes and observations from yesterday's Orange County Hispanic Bar Association annual fundraising dinner:

*Greeting the well-dressed, well-coiffed crowd as they drove toward the Westin South Coast Plaza hotel were about eight anti-Mexican whackjobs--and we don't add the "anti-illegal immigrant" qualifier like other journalists because they told more than one cute attorney of Mexican descent to "go home." Spotted was Lupe "Mexicans are Nazis; Americans are Jews" Moreno, the wab with the "Viva Minutemen" sign and other Know Nothings, whose sartorial sense showed that you don't have to be an illegal immigrant to dress swap meet-chic.

*Spotted: State senator Lou Correa, assemblyman Jose Solorio, and SanTana councilmembers Claudia Alvarez, Michelle Martinez, Vince Sarmiento, and David Benavides (Sal Tinajero was announced but I didn't see him). When Martinez and Alvarez sat at the same table, it sparked the coldest chill since the Ice Age.

*Winning bid for a dinner with yours truly and an autographed copy of my pinche book: $50. Damn cheap Mexicans...

*Course: so-so ceviche salad, delicious prawns paired with a too-tender tenderloined rubbed in a tasty adobo, and a soft, yummy chocolate ganache cake. Everyone could've been better served down the street at Bentoss.

*KCBS-TV Channel 2 reporter Dave Lopez served as emcee, and the legend was ornery. Twice, he browbeat people into shushing, at one point uttering "Gimme a break!" Love your stuff, Dave, but never imagined you to be such a diva.

*Somehow, I ended up with the business card of Los Angeles Times legal reporter Henry Weinstein. Bizarre...

*Your taxpayer dollars at work: all 560 attendees received two small chocolate bars (more like bites) wrapped in foil labeled with "University of California, Irvine." The chocolate was gross.

*In fairness to UCI, its new law professor Erwin Chemerinsky was the keynote speaker. Didn't stick around to hear his spiel, but betcha Mickadeit'll be all over it tomorrow.

*Special thanks to the folks at Rutan and Tucker for letting me sit at their table. When I asked about the whereabouts of their pendejo co-worker, Patrick Muñoz, they nervously laughed and move the conversation to polite topics.

We appreciate WeCanStoptheHate.org, a website run by perennial conservative cucuy the National Council of La Raza that documents the going-ons of various anti-immigrant pendejos. We don't agree with their efforts to boot said pendejos off the airwaves, and do they really want to eliminate one of their top reasons for existence? And while we're excited they cover some of our local Know Nothings, the NCLR should at least get their facts right--especially when it comes to the Weekly.

For instance, the website's entry on the California Coalition for Immigration Reform claims that the activities of CCIR fraulein Barbara Coe "convinced the Orange County Weekly to once name her one of the 'scariest' people in Orange County." While Coe is indeed frightening, she's never made our revered annual 31 Scariest People list--the closest Coe came was in 1999, when we said that dearly departed Weekly managing editor Matt Coker "went stiffer than California Coalition for Immigration Reform leader Barbara Coe’s Queen Victoria’s Secret panties" after encountering a real-life piece of crap while surfing in Huntington Beach.

Moving on to Minuteman founder Jim Gilchrist, WeCanStoptheHate.org says that the Southern Poverty Law Center reported he said, "I see neighborhood armies of 20 to 40 going out and killing and invading one another." They did--but Gilchrist made his prediction when talking to me. Proper citation, Raza, proper citation! And speaking of which, can you please note that Chris Simcox's infamous boast, "So far, we've had restraint, but I'm afraid that restraint is wearing thin. Take heed of our weapons because we're going to defend our borders by any means necessary" was first reported by the Weekly?

To the lower right of this post, you'll see a couple of Orange County blogs. It's just a smattering--indeed, we host more than our share of idiots. And few are worse than infamous Costa Mesa racialist Martin Millard.

We can never tell exactly what Millard rambles about, mostly because he fancies himself a novelist and thus resorts to cheap literary tricks. Take today, when a "U. Know Who" shares "his positions for his non-campaign in which he is not running for city council." U. Know who is none other than Millard himself, and rumors are flying of Millard joining his buddies Allan Mansoor, Eric Bever and Wendy Leece on the Costa Mesa City Council.

Hey, Marty: stick to describing the different varieties of women's pubic hair and the Jew jokes.

...has to be the one they ran last week asking readers what "is the most effective way to stop illegal immigration across the U.S.-Mexico border?"

Reporter Amy Taxin sure knows her audience--of the options available, none included "open the borders ala the European Union," "reform the current immigration system to encourage more legal migration" or "turn over the southwest United States already." About the closest opinion to such immigrant-friendly options was "there is no effective way to stop migration," a rather bleak assessment that only about 10 percent of Register voters agreed with. Way to be optimistic, cabrones!

"They came legally, though."

--Idiot Iowa woman whose ancestors invaded the Americas on the Mayflower, in response to the issue of illegal immigration.

Republican presidential candidate Ron Paul has some great ideas (anti-imperialism) and some stupid ones (deny amnesty and birthright citizenship to illegal immigrants), and it's this schizophrenic platform that has attracted sane folks (the editors of Reason magazine, Barry Manilow) and unrepentant wackjobs (neo-Nazis, Barry Manilow). Add to the latter's ranks one of Costa Mesa's blights: Mayor Allan Mansoor. The Daily Pilot reports today that Mansoor is officially endorsing Paul because he "trusts" the Texas congressman.

In other local extremist news, the Holocaust-denying Institute for Historical Review posts that the "Zionist" Anti-Defamation League is demanding Paul disassociate himself from extremists. And they're looking for an office manager? Do you deny the Holocaust, "have good computer skills, a demonstrated ability to produce quality work on a timely basis, reliability, self-initiative, a commitment to the ideals and goals of the IHR, and be able to work together well with others"? Then click here for your dream job!

Remember Pizza Patrón? Only if you're a Know Nothing. Last year, the Dallas-based pizza chain infuriated conservatives after announcing it would accept pesos in lieu of dollars at their locations. Lost in the debate was whether their pies were any bueno.

We'll find out soon enough. Across the street from Weekly world headquarters rises a new, faux-brick building. One of the businesses is Pizza Patrón's first Orange County outpost and just their fourth California location. Will Pizza Patrón destroy California's own Latino-themed pizzeria, La Pizza Loca? And isn't the fact that Mexicans are waging pizza wars further proof that assimilation in this country ALWAYS wins? Tune in next year to find out...

On its website, the California Department of Motor Vehicles warns all prospective vanity license plate holders that it "has the right to refuse any combination of letters and/or letters and numbers that may carry connotations offensive to good taste and decency." Obviously, someone at the DMV doesn't know Spanish--or has a wicked sense of humor. Spotted yesterday in Anaheim, on a black Acura, was this license plate*:

Simply put: WHAT'S UP, ASSHOLE?

"What's up, idiot" is the direct translation of the phrase, but Mexicans use "güey" as a vulgarity. Further proof that the Reconquista has won, or just bureaucratic tomfoolery? Our wager, as Grandpa Simpson once said: A little bit from Column A, a little bit from Column B.

Also available, according to the DMV's fun site: BABOSOS (dummies), PUTAS69 (whores 69), JOTOS69 (faggots 69), and CABRON6 (asshole 6)
*Sorry I had no camera to capture this momentous find, but you'll have to believe me...

The most common question I received all weekend, after I appeared on KFI-AM 640 to ply my ¡Ask a Mexican! spiel: How the hell did I smuggle myself onto the KFI airwaves? Tequila? Are they sponsoring my citizenship? Tamales?

Chalk it up to luck, idiocy, and graciousness.

A couple of months ago, I received an email from Neil Saavedra, KFI's marketing director, host of The Jesus Christ Show, and OC Weekly cover boy. He was wondering if I'd be interested in guest-hosting on KFI. After reassuring me he wasn't joking, Neil said he'd take the idea to KFI programming director Robin Bertolucci. We had lunch a couple of weeks later, where I pitched my radio show idea to the two--non-stop bashing of Carona and the Catholic Church, with ¡Ask a Mexican! for the last hour. They seemed interested but I left lunch with no promises for guest-hosting in the future.

One of the most-asked questions in ¡Ask a Mexican! history is why Mexican men love to sexually harass women so much. Folks don't seem to buy my explanation that it's a guy thing, not a Mexican thing.

Well, the recent reports exposing New York Jets fans as the greatest harassers since Bill Clinton should put the Mexican claims to rest--yeah, right...

See also the always-fabulous Smoking Gun for more idiot Jets fans...

Does anyone know the whereabouts of Jim Gilchrist's marbles? The venerated co-founder of the Neo-Minutemen wore Pampers over his clothes at a planned immigration debate today at California State University, Long Beach. Wait, we're getting word that Gilchrist had just been pulled away from Red Lobster's endless shrimp buffet before taking the stage.

Seriously, not completely sure whether this prop – apparently a flak jacket obviously meant to be worn underneath the clothes – was supposed to convey his bravery in the face of a potential assassin's bullet or obscure the coal-eyed, screw-toothed demon jutting from his chest and commanding his every action. The only thing missing from his get-up were oversized sleeves that tie around the back.

But aside from Gilchrist's questionable choice of rhetorical costume pieces, there is real news to be extracted from his recent appearance in Long Beach. The OCRegister notes that more than 150 people walked out when they smelled a setup at the scheduled debate between Gilchrist and Enrique Morones, a member of the Border Angels – a group that aids border crossers.

As per the report, about two-thirds of the audience filed out when they found out the moderator was an old drinking buddy of Gilchrist's (The moderator was not named in the article, but I'm guessing it was this lady).

After most of the audience left, Gilchrist stayed valiantly behind, choked back the tears and preached to the choir his views about immigrants (they suck yada yada).

Meanwhile those who left, and apparently about 50 additional people who must have smelled the pot, had a "Kum Ba Yah" fest outside. The Register reported that about 200 liberal hippies "took part in a rally organized by the Campus Coalition Against Hate. The crowd sang songs, faculty members gave speeches and students and teachers wore signs that said "my grandparents came here from (country)."

Alas, as fate would have it, nobody learned anything from the experience. Sigh.

Top photo by Leonard Ortiz of the OC Register

Not to pick on Irvine Islamic "expert" Robert Morey any further this week, but I was reminded of his idiocies today, as I bide my time in Fort Collins, Colorado, before a book signing hosted by the Rocky Mountain Chronicle. The paper runs a great column called "Tancrazy Train," which monitors Coloradoan Republican presidential candidate (and Orange County darling) Tom Tancredo (R-Know Nothinglandia). Learning that Tancredo has recently announced he's calling its quits, I was reminded that he once called for the United States to bomb the Muslim holy city of Mecca. Tancredo never apologized for the remark, but he should've apologized to Morey for stealing his idea. It was Morey, after all, whom in 2001 told a San Diego church "he had advised the State Department to blow up the Muslim holy cities of Mecca and Medina if they wanted to win the war on terror quickly."

"These cities could be vaporized in minutes, and there is nothing that the Saudis or any other Muslim country could do to stop us,” Morey would go on to write in his 2002 Winning the War Against Radical Islam. “With these surgical strikes, few lives would be lost. And, with three strikes against them, Islam is out!”

We can imagine Morey and Tancredo together: POW! BAM! ALLAH!

Speaking of explosions, check out Tancredo's latest fun. And read "Tancrazy Train" regularly.

When it comes to examining the root causes of illegal immigration, some Republicans work overtime to reconcile their hatred of "illegals" (cough—Mexicans!—cough-cough!) with the Bible—something that's not always easy to pull off given that the Bible preaches goodwill to those who are less fortunate.

Take the Oct. 29 opinion piece that appeared on the Republican Party of Orange County's website.

Rosie Avila starts off on a promising note, stating that the issue cannot be resolved until we “address some of its causes.” So, we should examine the socio-economic conditions on both sides of the border that fuel the practice of illegal immigration. Right?

Wrong!

When a bogus post went up on a fake CNN website late last week with the headline: "Separatists Claim Responsibility for California Wildfires" and which included a "confirmation" by Gov. Schwarzenegger that MECha (the Aztlan-loving student group) had claimed responsibility for the fires, anti-immigrant websites spread the story, well, like wildfire.

Bloggers eagerly jumped at the fake bait and swallowed the hoax whole, calling for armageddon, a new Mexican-American war and anything else violent under the sun against all Mexicans everywhere before discovering the "lie" in "cnnheadLIEnews.com." (The site is no longer sporting the fake news report).

By law, I'm not allowed to say anything nice about the University of Southern California--I'm a UCLA grad (fire Dorrell!), and many of the lords of Orange County (from Theo Lacy to John Wayne to Mike Schroeder) attended Troy. But I always liked current Trojans quarterback Mark Sanchez, not just because he's an OC guy, but mostly because he and his Mission Viejo High Diablos took the local prep spotlight away from the pedophile protectors at Mater Dei and Santa Margarita High for a couple of years. The fact that his last name is Hispanic meant nothing to me: I figured he was a half-breed of some sort, someone far removed from his Latino roots. Besides, quarterbacking while Mexican means nothing to Latinos if you can't guide your team to victory. That's why Jim Plunkett, Tony Romo, and Joe Kapp are always mentioned in a recap of great Latino quarterbacks, while Tom Flores tends to get cited more for his coaching days.

So imagine my absolute glee when KSPN-710 reporter Beto Duran clued me into a brewing controversy involving Sanchez and his mouthpiece. Seems that while leading USC's 38-0 victory last Saturday over Notre Dame (I'm a subway alum, yet another reason I despise 'SC), Sanchez wore a mouthpiece decorated in the colors of the Mexican flag, down to the eagle clutching a snake while perching on a cactus. Apparently, it was a joke between Sanchez and USC's dentist, a Cuban named Dr. Rojas. Apparently, people aren't pleased with Sanchez's chiste. Crazy non-sequitur racist rant after the jump:

Slate blogger Mickey Kaus (he of the boldface) has an interesting post about disappearing Mexicans where he virtually proclaims anecdotal evidence superior to academic studies. As proof of Mexicans disappearing, he cites the comments of an Anaheim Union High School District English teacher on another blog who says her classes are smaller than ever and devoid of immigrant students. For some reason, Kaus bolds the below passage:

"ALL my students, for the first time in my career, have insisted that I eschew their given names and use an anglicized version (e.g. Mary for Maricruz, Judy for Yuridia, Tommy for Tomas, etc.) instead. No one is speaking Spanish inside or outside the classroom."

If Kaus is looking for a trend, he's late to it: Santa Ana Unified has been experiencing student losses (first sentence only--the rest is about the fag-hating Chuck Smith) way before ICE began rounding up and wrasslin' illegals. But what's most mystifying is the above excerpt, as it proves nothing about the types of students left in Anaheim high schools (the teacher never revealed at which school she teaches). Want anecdotal evidence, Mickey? Here ya go:

Right about now three Southern California men probably wish that they'd just gone home after drinking booze at the Angels 9-6 loss to the Boston Red Sox on August 8.

Or, perhaps, James Joseph Kelly, 26, Justin Louis Mullins, 23, and Cheyne Danica Wilson, 25, wish that the final event of their evening together had been getting more drunk and watching strippers wiggle inside Larry Flynt's Hustler Club in Westminster.

Had they made either choice they wouldn't be facing the possibility of prison for committing a ridiculously juvenile but serious crime, according to the Orange County District Attorney's office.

Nope. Kelly (picture 1), Mullins and Wilson (plus a fourth individual who was not charged in the case) left the titty club drunk at about 2 a.m. and drove several blocks away to an intersection where they engaged the driver of another vehicle.

"Go back to Mexico, you wetback!" they shouted at Felipe Alvarado, who was on his way to work as the night-shift janitor at an In-N-Out Burger in Garden Grove, according to police records. Alvarado, an *illegal immigrant, rolled up his windows in fear and drove away when the light turned green. The group followed him to the fast food restaurant parking lot, where the three men viciously assaulted Alvarado while yelling racial slurs, according to prosecutor Scott Steiner, who heads the DA's hate crimes unit.

A worried witness contacted police who captured the men attempting to flee. An illegal handgun was recovered, which prompted police to also charge Wilson (picture 2) with carrying a loaded gun in public. Alvarado collapsed in the street and was rushed to a hospital to treat his injuries.

For the last month, the men thought they faced felony assault charges which carried a maximum of four years in prison. Now, Kelly and Wilson--both of whom are free on bail--face a maximum of eight years if convicted.

It's worst for Mullins of Garden Grove. If convicted, a judge has the power to punish him for up to 12 years because he was already on probation before the In-N-Out Burger incident. In 2006, Mullins (picture 3) pleaded guilty to drunk driving and speeding over 100 mph. In 2004, he was convicted of beating a spouse or co-habitant, false imprisonment and making criminal threats. He remains locked in the Orange County Jail.

At today's hearing at West Court in Little Saigon, all three men claimed they are not guilty. Superior Court Judge Stephanie George ordered an October 30 preliminary hearing.

After the hearing, Wilson (of Hesperia) and Kelly (of California City) huddled together and chatted about their belief they won't serve any prison time even if convicted. They'd come to court wearing black suits, conservative haircuts and sober faces.

It is a felony in California to assault another person based on a victim's perceived race, color, religion, ancestry, national origin, sexual orientation, gender, or disability. Those thinking about testing the DA's office on the subject should think again. Steiner has proven he will aggressively prosecute hate crimes.

In June, Cal State Fullerton frat boy Gaston Alejandro Gastelum pleaded guilty for beating up two tiny, young women he thought were lesbians. Gastelum originally claimed the girls assaulted him but changed his story to avoid a trial and a possible three-year prison sentence. He got 30 days in jail plus community service.

Earlier this year, 23-year-old Ronald Lee Bray of Costa Mesa got 32 months in prison for beating a black man in a wheelchair while he barked racial slurs.

(After this story was published a government official said that Alvarado's current immigration status is unclear.)

*Updated, with grammatical erros bolded

The last time I saw Glenn Spencer (founder of the frothingly anti-immigrant American Patrol), the portly man was sporting a huge smile as a race riot erupted around him. The occasion was a Dec. 8, 2001 rally in front of Anaheim City Hall, where Spencer and his amigos were decrying the Anaheim Police Department’s policy to accept Mexican-government-issued identification cards as proper ID for illegal immigrants. Anarchists counter-protested Spencer's ilk--and then, the deluge.

Spencer waddled to the Arizona-Mexico border some time after that incident to set up a Mexican-monitoring service that continues to this day. From somewhere in the desert, he continues to issue bombastic missives about Mexican immigrants--none more louder than the gospel of Reconquista. But his latest screed combines the conspiratorial with the personal as he railed against Los Angeles Daily News reporter Rachel Uranga.

The blog of David Duke-approved local racialist Martin Millard is our local Net version of the scruffy man with a shopping cart. And like those rambling, smelly men that straggle up and down Harbor Boulevard, Millard writes stuff once in a while that rises above the usual rambles about illegal aliens, soccer and the glories of Costa Mesa Mayor Allan Mansoor to really strike you as bizarre. Take his latest post, one where...um, it's something about how the Daily Pilot is Aztlanista and lawn mowing. But then, we come to this gem:

Note for trivia buffs: U-know-who appeared in a Woody Allen movie

(For the uninitiated into Millard's galaxy: U-know-who is Millard--don't bother trying to figure out why)

In the past, Millard has claimed he was the inspiration for Travis Brickle in Taxi Driver, but this is the first time we know of that Marty has said he acted in an Allen film. An Internet movie database search (the most comprehensive archive of movies on Earth) revealed that a Martin Millard once acted in something called The Second Coming of Suzanne, which stars Richard Dreyfuss. Geoff West over at A Bubbling Cauldron claims to have seen Millard's Allen role, saying "I've seen that 'performance'. Trust me, not only is this guy a 'bad actor' when it comes to activities in this city, he's a bad actor, period." What we want to know is which film did Millard appear in, and what scene? More importantly, how does Millard square up his previous association with Jews with stuff like this?

My colleague R. Scott Moxley loves to paint an aura of homoeroticism around Orange County Register columnist Gordon Dillow whenever the crank writes about men in uniform, but the Dillow-nator (as former Weekly managing editor Matt Coker loved to call him) also has a hard-on for Know Nothings. Yet nothing Dillow has ever published will ever compare to the spilled load that was today's piece on deposed Anaheim Union High School District trustee Harald Martin. Martin, you may recall, was appointed by AUHSD trustees to fill a vacancy this summer but resigned last week in the face of a pitchfork-and-torch-wielding recall effort. Harald--who previously, controversially served from 1994 through 2002--vows to run again. In the meanwhile, however, Martin told his side of the recall to Dillow--not a big shock. But, wait--there's more after the jump...

The very first article I ever did--and I mean ever; I spent my college years trying to become a Latino Kubrick--dealt with how the Democratic Party used the spectre of former California Governor Pete "Proposition 187" Wilson to scare Latinos into voting Democrat. We haven't heard much from Pete since until this weekend, when supporters unveiled a statue of his likeness in San Diego, where he started his political career. The ceremony was marred by angry Mexicans and gays, who rightfully accused Wilson of bigotry, but we expected that. The true surprise was the brave people who signed up to fend off the inevitable wave vandals: the Irvine Company. The lords of Orange County recently acquired Horton Plaza, where Wilson's statue will stand until someone tears it down like a Tan Nguyen sign. But betcha Don Bren puts extra security there, as he definitely doesn't want to piss off someone who sits on his board of directors.

The big news on Grand Street is that longtime Orange County Register publisher N. Christian Anderson III is leaving the paper--pushed out, according to the Los Angeles Times, as "part of a company reorganization," according to the Reg. The Times story noted that Anderson--who Editor & Publisher mysteriously named Publisher of the Year for 2007--failed miserably in his two recent attempts to squash the OC Weekly, the OC Post and Squeeze OC.

But what interests us the most are the Register readers' feedback on the Reg's website.