Urine, You're Out, You're Back In Again

urinal.jpgNews item: A Huntington Beach man who co-owns the company that makes the "Whizzinator" that allows workers, job-seekers and parolees to fake drug tests pleaded guilty in a Pittsburgh, Pa., federal court Monday to conspiracy to defraud the government and conspiracy to sell drug paraphernalia.

 

Joining Robert Dennis Catalano in pleading guilty were the 62-year-old's partner, George W. Wills, 65, of San Pedro, and their Signal Hill-based Puck Technology Inc. They are scheduled to be sentenced on Feb. 20.

 

According to this right here, Puck started in 1999, classifies itself as a medical technology company and reports annual sales of $2.2 million for its line of clean-urine dispensing faux weenies.

 

So you might say the feds really took the piss outta these guys.

 

If they lied in court, would they be guilty of perjur-pee?

 

Guess this halts production of their new gizmo for black gentlemen, Whizzinator Magnum.

 

You can't blame the owners for having thought of fake pissing devices considering all the Flomax ads men their age are subjected to.

 

Besides the "Whizzinator," Puck Technology sells another urination simulation device called, and this is true, "Number 1." Message to Santa: should Puck have a spin-off product, please do not fill my stocking with "Number 2."

 

Okay, I'll stop now. Call me pee shy. My rain has ended. Don't wanna be accused of yellow journalism. Aiiiiiiiiiiiiii...


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