Crime Time: Ninja! Gang-y! Homeless! Unappreciative! Dead!

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Friday: Paging Chuck Norris!
It's the Weekly's weekly round-up of local police calls--now with more unappreciative homeless men, alleged Ecstasy pushers and Ninjas, Ninjas, Ninjas!

MONDAY, AUG. 3

Wrong-Way Minivan After clocking a green minivan at 80 mph south on Beach Boulevard near the 405 freeway just after 2 a.m., a CHP officer activated his patrol car's flashing lights and gave chase. At Edinger Avenue, the minivan suddenly started heading south in Beach's northbound lanes and continued going the wrong way through several intersections, some times at speeds over 100 mph and with the copper only 150 feet away. The van seemed to have escaped at one point, but moments later the officer discovered it had collided with another vehicle at Slater Avenue and Ward Street in Fountain Valley. David Ortigoza, 21, was treated at Fountain Valley Regional Hospital for minor injuries before being booked into Orange County Jail on suspicion of driving under the influence and evading police. The other driver was apparently unhurt.

TUESDAY, AUG. 4

Grand Finale A Santa Ana police officer called around 6:40 p.m. to investigate a report of a suspicious person in the 2700 block of North Grand Avenue found a man wandering around under the Grand off-ramp from the eastbound 22 freeway, near a drainage ditch and sound wall. The man allegedly became agitated while talking with the unidentified officer who, feeling threatened by suspicious movements, fired several shots from his service revolver into the wanderer's torso. The man, later identified as Nels Christensen Martin, 29, of Orange, died at Western Medical Center-Santa Ana.
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Wednesday: I'll show you issues.
WEDNESDAY, AUG. 5

Where's Dr. Phil When You Need Him? Police received a call just before 4:20 p.m. saying a man was on the ground in the 16600 block of Beach Boulevard in Huntington Beach "rolling around" and looking like he "is having issues." Oil, dirt and grass stains may be some of them.

Were They Coupons for Beer? Two men selling coupons knocked on a woman's door in the 2000 block of Alabama Street in Huntington Beach just after 9 p.m. Their pitch took what she considered a "weird" turn when they asked her for beer. Then they split, perhaps late for a summit at the White House.

THURSDAY, AUG. 6

Nightmare on Elm Street A woman who is a sexual abuse awareness activist found one of her group's shirts ripped up with powder all over it in the 17100 block of Elm Street in Huntington Beach just before 7 a.m. A resident later confessed to the evil deed, saying it was meant to be a humorous prank. Start laughing any time now.

FRIDAY, AUG. 7

Ready, Aim, No Fire A man riding a bicycle through an alley near 111 South Flower Avenue in Brea just after 1 p.m. stopped to ask another man on foot if he lived in the nearby apartments. The 30-year-old answered yes. Wrong answer, apparently. The bicyclist, who was about 10 years younger, pulled a gun from his waistband, took aim and pulled the trigger. But the gun did not fire, the bicyclist pedaled away and the victim called the cops. An investigation later led to the arrest of Cesar Aviles, 20, of Brea, on suspicion of attempted murder. Police say a gun was recovered from Aviles' home.

Numb Chuck A man wearing a karate uniform and acting all "Ninja" yelled out the window of a home in the 16900 block of Algonquin Street in Huntington Beach that he was going to come down and shoot someone. Police closed Pacific Coast Highway temporarily around 1:30 p.m., and witnesses managed to hold faux Chuck Norris before handing him off to police.

Stopped and Robbed An unidentified man was walking west in the 1600 block of West Cubbon Street, near West McFadden Avenue in Santa Ana just before 11 p.m. when two men confronted him and one punched him in the face, knocking him down. They stole his phone and money before taking off.
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