Politician Demands Washington Redskins Change Name But Ignores Other Offensive NFL Teams

Categories: Politics, Sports

Cowboy fan Cole: This is a sneaky racist symbol and, besides, they beat my pokes twice last year
Oklahoma Republican Congressman Tom Cole might be a mirror image of Orange County's blowhard Dana Rohrabacher: both are crafty, career politicians, who, depending on the day, flip-flop between conservatism and libertarianism to suit their own particular, political agendas.

Some days they despise government bureaucrats (and even more so: other politicians) lecturing private business owners about how to run their companies.

In his non-libertarian persona, Cole has been taking periodic leave of weighty economic, meteorological and national security concerns to try to force Daniel Snyder, private owner of the Washington Redskins, to change the team's name because he insists "Redskins" is equivalent to the "N" word.

If Cole, an admitted fan of Redskins' rival Dallas Cowboys, is sincere--and that's an open question, here's a list of other offensive NFL team names he can also campaign against:

Jet abuse
New York Jets:
Crime: Massive pollution causing machine
Offended party: Environmentalists and climate-change advocates

Kansas City Chiefs:
Crime: Elitism
Offended party: Workers, underachieving people and individuals who shun lofty titles

New York Giants:
Crime: Heightism
Offended party: Children, Danny DeVito, Ed Royce and other little people

Texan abuse
Houston Texans:
Crime: Crappy president production
Offended party: The world and future generations of humans

Tennessee Titans:
Crime: Unjust wealth accumulation
Offended party: The 99 percent

Jacksonville Jaguars:
Crime: Genetically polluted mix from lion and tiger
Offended party: Species purists like white supremacists

49er abuse
San Francisco 49ers:
Crime: Ruthlessly unjust gold rush system
Offended party: Chinese immigrants

Pittsburgh Steelers:
Crime: Overabundance of construction
Offended party: Rural proponents, wood product suppliers and plastic manufacturers

St. Louis Rams:
Crime: Measure their maleness by the size of their horns
Offended party: Undersized sheep

Fashion abuse
Cleveland Browns:
Crime: Fashion violation
Offended: Everyone who prefers black and Wayne Brady

Indianapolis Colts:
Crime: Snobbery
Offended party: Ponies and donkeys

Bill abuse
Buffalo Bills:
Crime: Serial killer of Bison
Offended party: Native Americans

Detroit Lions:
Crime: Animal kingdom homosexuality
Offended party: God, The 700 Club and Lou Sheldon's Traditional Values Coalition

Dallas Cowboys:
Crime: Sexism
Offended party: Girls, transgender individuals, Hermaphrodites and real men

Raider abuse
Oakland Raiders:
Crime: Murder, rape, thievery and centuries of mayhem on the seas
Offended party: Women, innocent sea merchants, sailors and anyone who isn't intoxicated

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Email: rscottmoxley@ocweekly.com. Twitter: @RScottMoxley.

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