The OCeeker: A Natural Healing Center of Orange County and the Queens of the New Age

Welp, the OCeeker just scared the Shirley MacLaine out of a psychic. 

He took his seekin' ass down to A Natural Healing Center of Orange County in Costa Mesa, to hop into a meditation circle for some energy healing.

Looks like the queens of the New Age down there may need some healing they ownselves.

March 23, 7 p.m.

Located in an upstairs office in an industrial complex at Grace Lane and Baker Street, the smell of sage wafted through the halls as soft New Age music could be heard upon entrance to the meditation circle. The cozy little room was lit dimly by an orange lamp in the corner. 

There was a couch against one wall, and a bed (yes, a bed) pushed against another. A couple of blankets draped the furniture, and a small fountain in one corner dribbled about. The dying day shared its last rays of light through two stained glass windows. 

The OCeeker was greeted warmly by three women (hey now!): Jessica, Mary Ann (good-lookin' out boo, give ol' boy a call sometime!) and Kelly. Taking a chair in the circle, the OCeeker let the gals regale him with tales of meditation. 

Not a Japanese baseball player
​They explained that they also do Reiki therapy, where one lays down and allows a practitioner to place hands on them, or else hover their hands over them and pull negative energy out of the body and spirit, replacing it with energy that heals physically and spiritually. The practice was developed in the early 1920s by a Japanese Buddhist named Makao Usui. Mekhi Phifer to you too, bro. 

"It's all about whatever you believe," they said, noting that one could believe the healing was from God, the universe or R. Scott Moxley. Kidding. They didn't mention Moxley. 

Jessica said her abilities, which include the psychic kind, come from prayer and God. Before the meditation, we were joined by a guy named Chris, and a man and woman whose names the OCeeker forgets. (Need to get the memory Reiki-fied!) The woman mentioned that the OCeeker's hands were nice and warm. That's what she said, heh. Anyway, everyone there was friendly. They even made small talk about Costa Rica, which reminded the OCeeker that he's the only white guy in America who hasn't visited there. 

Roots is deep

Jessica told us to relax our bodies as we prepared for meditation. We closed our eyes and breathed deeply. She also said we shouldn't panic if we felt like we were floating. The meditation began with a "grounding", where we were instructed to imagine the roots of a tree wrapping around our legs and holding us to the ground. 

For several minutes, the OCeeker couldn't get The Roots' "The Seed (2.0)" out of his pomade-enhanced head: 

Straight meditatin'
​"I push my seed in her bush for life. It's gonna work because I'm pushin' it right. If Mary dropped my baby girl tonight, I would name her Rock'N'Roll." 

We then commenced to holding our chakras -- the seven energy centers that supposedly run up our spines. Chakra Khan. Chakra Khan. Chakra-Chakra-Chakra. Chakra Khan. I fee-el for you! 

The OCeeker didn't meditate on much, but he did pray his tummy wouldn't rumble. Dadgum Mexican food. We released our negative energy (or gas) back into the tree roots and down into the earth. Then, with the fountain gently dancing and the music whispering, we let the "crystal energy" flow through us from the tops of our heads. 

Aaaaaaaaaand out came the beds.

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