It's a Small Line After All: Disney Cracks Down on FastPass Abuse

Categories: Dishney
You can poke a tiger with a stick, out an uncover narc and give a wedgie to a made assassin, but one thing you do NOT want to fuck with is Disney's FastPass system.

For those who have not had the pleasure of parting with mortgage payments at Disneyland and California Adventure within the past 13 years, a FastPass is essentially a reservation ticket for a place in a shorter line feeding into a popular ride.

First, you pick up your FastPass near the ride's entrance. Stamped onto it will be a one-hour window when you can return and get in a fast lane to almost the front while all those suckers experiencing sunstroke wait it out in a line stretching to the Brea border.

Ah, but some frequent parkgoers figured out that if they returned to the ride with their FastPasses after their one-hour windows expired, an always smiling Disney attractions host still allowed them to cut to the front. That pretty much destroyed what the ride reservation system was intended to do: manage crowd sizes throughout the day so those with or without passes are better served.

The Mouse recently disclosed it is cracking down on FastPass abusers. The goal, says a Disney spokeseteer, is to maintain a fair system for all guests. How? By having attractions hosts deal with pass holders who arrive past the specified time window on a case-by-case basis.

And if that doesn't work, there is still the slave camp under Tom Sawyer's Island where they can and will send your sorry ass.

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