5 New "Christological" Crystal Cathedral Names

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While the Roman Catholic Diocese of Orange is allowing Crystal Cathedral ministry to stay there for another three years before completely taking over, Bishop Tod Brown is seeking a new name now, with submissions accepted through Feb. 20 at rcbo.org/cathedral-name. Brown asks only that the name be "Christological" or keeping with the nature and person of Jesus Christ. That got us thinking . . .

Remember JC's famous quote from Sunday school? You know, the one based on his telling his disciples (via Matthew 19:25-29): "I tell you the truth, it is hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than it is for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God."

First, to our Lord and savior: Jesus Christ, Jesus, engage in class warfare much? You'd never make it through a GOP presidential debate with a mouth like that. Yet, in the spirit of that divisive statement and others, here are five nominees for new names for Crystal Cathedral, which you'll recall is a massive, gaudy glass structure in Garden Grove that the Diocese picked up for $57 million and change in bankruptcy court.

Oppressed and Poor Palace
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Luke 4:16-19: "He went to Nazareth, where he had been brought up, and on the Sabbath day he went into the synagogue, as was his custom. He stood up to read, and the scroll of the prophet Isaiah was handed to him. Unrolling it, he found the place where it is written: 'The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor.'"

Sell What You Own Place
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Mark 10:21-22: "Then Jesus beholding him loved him, and said unto him, 'One thing thou lackest: go thy way, sell whatsoever thou hast, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come, take up the cross, and follow me.'  And he was sad at that saying, and went away grieved, for he had great possessions."

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24 comments
Diane
Diane

Why do you care what the cathedral is named? I mean, it's not as if you'll be going there or making any kind of donation. Does it really matter?

Not Touching Me!
Not Touching Me!

Im all for Palace of Petting...or House of Horny Trousers...or maybe Little Lovers Shrine...

Dave Lieberman
Dave Lieberman

Let's all flood them with suggestions for St. Germaine Cousin, the (French) patron saint of abused children.

mitch young
mitch young

Jesus loves cheap labor, but doesn't believe in equal pay for equal work.

For the kingdom of heaven is like unto a man that is an householder, which went out early in the morning to hire labourers into his vineyard. And when he had agreed with the labourers for a penny a day, he sent them into his vineyard. And he went out about the third hour, and saw others standing idle in the marketplace, And said unto them; Go ye also into the vineyard, and whatsoever is right I will give you. And they went their way. Again he went out about the sixth and ninth hour, and did likewise. And about the eleventh hour he went out, and found others standing idle, and saith unto them, Why stand ye here all the day idle? They say unto him, Because no man hath hired us. He saith unto them, Go ye also into the vineyard; and whatsoever is right, that shall ye receive. So when even was come, the lord of the vineyard saith unto his steward, Call the labourers, and give them their hire, beginning from the last unto the first. And when they came that were hired about the eleventh hour, they received every man a penny. But when the first came, they supposed that they should have received more; and they likewise received every man a penny. And when they had received it, they murmured against the goodman of the house, Saying, These last have wrought but one hour, and thou hast made them equal unto us, which have borne the burden and heat of the day. But he answered one of them, and said, Friend, I do thee no wrong: didst not thou agree with me for a penny? Take that thine is, and go thy way: I will give unto this last, even as unto thee. Is it not lawful for me to do what I will with mine own? Is thine eye evil, because I am good? So the last shall be first, and the first last: for many be called, but few chosen.

mitch young
mitch young

Jesus approves of investment banking...While they were listening to this, he went on to tell them a parable, because he was near Jerusalem and the people thought that the kingdom of God was going to appear at once. 12He said: “A man of noble birth went to a distant country to have himself appointed king and then to return. 13 So he called ten of his servants and gave them ten minas.[a] ‘Put this money to work,’ he said, ‘until I come back.’   14 “But his subjects hated him and sent a delegation after him to say, ‘We don’t want this man to be our king.’   15 “He was made king, however, and returned home. Then he sent for the servants to whom he had given the money, in order to find out what they had gained with it.   16 “The first one came and said, ‘Sir, your mina has earned ten more.’   17 “‘Well done, my good servant!’ his master replied. ‘Because you have been trustworthy in a very small matter, take charge of ten cities.’   18 “The second came and said, ‘Sir, your mina has earned five more.’   19 “His master answered, ‘You take charge of five cities.’   20 “Then another servant came and said, ‘Sir, here is your mina; I have kept it laid away in a piece of cloth. 21 I was afraid of you, because you are a hard man. You take out what you did not put in and reap what you did not sow.’   22 “His master replied, ‘I will judge you by your own words, you wicked servant! You knew, did you, that I am a hard man, taking out what I did not put in, and reaping what I did not sow? 23 Why then didn’t you put my money on deposit, so that when I came back, I could have collected it with interest?’   24 “Then he said to those standing by, ‘Take his mina away from him and give it to the one who has ten minas.’   25 “‘Sir,’ they said, ‘he already has ten!’   26 “He replied, ‘I tell you that to everyone who has, more will be given, but as for the one who has nothing, even what they have will be taken away. 27 But those enemies of mine who did not want me to be king over them—bring them here and kill them in front of me.’”

mitch young
mitch young

"While he was in Bethany, reclining at the table in the home of Simon the Leper, a woman came with an alabaster jar of very expensive perfume, made of pure nard. She broke the jar and poured the perfume on his head. 4 Some of those present were saying indignantly to one another, “Why this waste of perfume?5 It could have been sold for more than a year’s wages[a] and the money given to the poor.” And they rebuked her harshly.   6 “Leave her alone,” said Jesus. “Why are you bothering her? She has done a beautiful thing to me. 7 The poor you will always have with you,[b] and you can help them any time you want. But you will not always have me. 8 She did what she could. She poured perfume on my body beforehand to prepare for my burial. 9 Truly I tell you, wherever the gospel is preached throughout the world, what she has done will also be told, in memory of her"

mitch young
mitch young

That's funny, I saw the 60 minutes thing on Colbert, and he has a driver pick him up (I imagine comedy central pays for it) to take his liberal ass to work. 

Just think if he would deign to drive himself, then his driver could be mentoring street kids or distributing clean needles to junkies or giving condoms to young male prostitutes so they don't get HIV from their chickenhawks.

JEWBALL
JEWBALL

LAURA CUNNINGHAM FOR CONGRESS

Bobo
Bobo

"Palace of Pride"

gustavoarellano
gustavoarellano

Not a single pedo-priest reference? I CAST THE DEMON OUT OF YOU!!!

Daniel
Daniel

Crystal Cathedral.... the googles tell me that St. Barbara is the patron saint of geology. Nah, too geeky.

Santa Anna? Lady of Guadalupe? Maybe too obvious. 

Oh, I know. Jesus of Suburbia! 

mitch young
mitch young

Isn't that the trendy new liquor? St. Germaine? I know its s fusbol klub.

gustavoarellano
gustavoarellano

Only a pathetic lowlife such as yourself, Paul Crouch, Schuller, and Kenton Beshore truly believe Jesus favored the rich over the poor...

Matthew T. Coker
Matthew T. Coker

While I'm sure Mr. Colbert enjoys the fringes of 1 percenterdom (indeed, he mines jokes from it), in his defense it is standard practice that "talent" is limoed to shoots. Folks who live within walking distance of studios are also often forced to take rides. There are specific windows of time for studio use, crew hours and loading in audiences. Excuses of oversleep, being mobbed by fans on the way or the car breaking down just don't cut it.

Matthew T. Coker
Matthew T. Coker

At least the ceilings are high enough for a 20-foot Jeebus.

mitch young
mitch young

OCSG -- a great name for a balompie club.

mitch young
mitch young

That's not what I believe. In fact, as a cultural Catholic, I do believe in JPII's 'preferential option for the poor.' But the fact is that Jesus' gospel is much, much more complicated than that. From the rich youth, he demands everything be sold -- from the wealthy tax collector , half is okay, plus restitution for any cheating. Forgiveness for the prostitute, but 'go and sin no more'. A complex character, this 'Jesus the Christ'.  Prince of peace, yes, but no demand that the Roman Centurion give up his profession.

At any rate, I don't find anywhere in the gospel (and as a brought up Catholic, we cover a good bit of it in the 3 year cycle of readings, as I'm sure you know) , where getting the Romans/Greeks/Herodian dynasty to tax others for the benefit of the poor is somehow meritorious. 

mitch young
mitch young

Sure, and that's why supposedly 'high value' corporate execs fly around in private jets, so they can strategerize for the hours they are in flight.

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