6 Questions Pastor Rick Warren Should Ask Tony Blair

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Coming up next on The Saddleback Church Comedy Hour With Pastor Rick is former British Prime Minister Tony Blair, who stunned Americans with his poise, intelligence and speaking ability at podiums next to George W. Bush's--while at the same time being branded "Bush's poodle" by Brits.

Rick Warren vows to ask "Bliar" about Egypt, education, illiteracy, spiritual emptiness, corrupt leadership, extreme poverty and pandemic diseases. If we could impersonate the voice of God in Pastor Rick's ear, here are six more questions we'd have him blurt out at the March 6 meet-up.

  • While you were P.M., your right-hand man cut off an interviewer who asked about your Christianity with, "We don't do God." Will you do God today?

  • If you do do God today, do you consider yourself a born-again Christian since you and your wife Cherie participated in a New Age rebirthing procedure that involved smearing mud and fruit over each other's bodies while sitting in a steam bath in Mexico?

  • What in Hades did you mean when you said religious leaders must start "rethinking" their stands against homosexuality? And look me in the eye when you answer, limey.

  • What kind of silver polish did you use on Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu to make up for calling him an "armor-plated bullshitter"?

  • How do you square your promises of a 20-percent reduction in carbon dioxide choking God's creation with emissions actually rising during your term?

  • What about your Labour Party's promise that 10 percent of U.K. energy would come from renewable resources by 2010 while only 3 percent did?

Slick Rick will also dangle his International Medal of Peace around TB's neck at the Lake Forest Church's 7th Civil Forum. More details are coming, vow church chatters. The word of the Lord.

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