Orange County Interwebs Horror Show Surfs Cities

Categories: OC Media
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This week's Orange County Interwebs Horror Show goes from city to city to see what is being said about them on the Interwebs. Mayors, chambers of commerce officials and visitors and convention bureaucrats may want to skip this one. (Especially in Fullerton, Santa Ana, Mission Viejo, Huntington Beach, San Juan Capistrano and our neighbor in the next county, Long Beach.)

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Illustration by Jay Brockman
San Gone Capistrano Many Native Americans were wiped off the map with the establishment of Mission San Juan Capistrano, but who knew the city has been erased as well? That's what one is to conclude given this answer to someone who asked how far it is from San Juan Capistrano to Mexico. "The distance from Mexico to San Jose California is 693 km. This equals to 431 miles. San Juan Capistrano California is not coming up." (ChaCha)

Tagged, You're It Friends for Fullerton's Future writer "Mr. Peabody" did not like an Orange County Register article by Adam Townsend and Jessica Terrell on graffiti in town. In particular, Mr. P. did not like the choice of LA County Deputy Sheriff Mike Thibodeaux as an authority on the subject. The cop worries Fullerton may become a "mecca" for graffiti artists due to the town's thriving art scene, "youth culture" around Cal State Fullerton and proliferation of tattoo shops that graffiti artists often graduate to as a career move. Writes Mr. Peabody: "Mecca. Well, you can't have a Mecca without a jihad. And, of course, the idiotic statement goes unchallenged by our intrepid reporters by at least asking for a single shred of evidence tying graffiti to 'youth culture' at CSUF, tattoo parlors, or even legitimate artists." He concludes with a question: "Say, what is 'youth culture,' anyway?" (Friends For Fullerton's Future)

Dogged Pursuit You're standing in Santa Ana when a stray dog walks up and bites you. I'll bet race cars to doughnuts you don't even think about the most obvious statistic when that happens, do you? Tke it away, dog trainer: "Most Santa Ana dog bite and dog attack victims are not aware of the fact that on a daily basis, more than 1,000 dog bite and dog attack victims are treated in hospital emergency rooms. About 15-20 of these dog bite attacks result in death." Wake up, people! Don't think about silly time wasters like pain, rabies and blood stains on your Bermuda shorts. It's stats, STATS! (Obedience Training for Dogs Blog)

Speaking of Dog Bites . . . The Jackson & Wilson law firm of Mission Viejo demonstrates why you should not outsource your copy writing out to India: "Each year dozens of announce who live in Mission Viejo, California, be converted into dog bite victims. Crosswise the United States, very near 5,000,000 announce are bitten or attacked by dogs and 334,000 dog bite and dog hit victims plea urgent circumstances affect check behavior. Most Mission Viejo dog bite and dog hit victims are not attentive of the fact that on a day after day foothold, more than 1,000 dog bite and dog hit victims are treated in sickbay urgent circumstances place to stay such as Mission Viejo Affect check Focal top and Saddleback Sickbay. In this area 15-20 of these dog bite attacks consequence in fatality." Ruff, rough. (Drug Rehab People)

Punk-Killing Sopranos After visiting San Pedro and Long Beach, a recent visitor reached Surf City. Some city leaders might take offense to its description: "After that we ventured into the OC to Huntington Beach, which is kind of like the New Jersey of Southern California. I seem to remember reading about how the HB jocks discovered Black Flag and ruined the punk scene, and it makes a lot of sense." (Killed by Crafts)

Long Beach to Lose Its Hat, Ass and Overcoat? The recent shooting death of an unarmed man on a Belmont Shores porch by Long Beach police officers has riled up Yelpers. "The LBC will get sued and there will be some shit upon this," opines Gerard "www.whysoblu.com" I. Napha "Non-Stop" N. notes, "Man he got capped and then they still put him in handcuffs!!!" Jeremy "Jez" M. says of the police contention that the slain man was holding a garden hose nozzle officers mistook for a gun, "[I]t is debatable if he was even holding anything; there is no hose or spigot on that porch. Also, you can legally sit on your porch and hold a unloaded gun. These cops should be on trial, not just fired." And another commenter's thought that the shooting "was not totally unjustifiable" brought this from Max "The Devil's Advocate" P.: "The police surrounded and then without identifying themselves killed, with two shotgun blasts and 6 rounds of 9mm ammo, an inebriated man holding a garden hose nozzle. NOT totally unjustifiable? Are you nuts? I hope the cops are shitcanned ASAP and that the City of Long Beach loses its hat, ass and overcoat in a lawsuit." (Yelp)

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