Freeze, Punk! It's OC's Crime-y State Beaches

Crime scene

​Four of the six most crime-infested state parks are in Orange County, and each is a state beach.

Oceano Dunes State Vehicular Recreation Area near Pismo Beach logged by far the highest number of crime calls in 2009 with nearly 6,000. Lake Perris State Recreation Area near Riverside had nearly twice fewer crimes, but they were still enough to land at No. 2.

What follows is a breakdown of the OC state beaches that took spots 3-6 for being the most crime-y . . .

(But first, credit for compiling the crime stats goes to reporters from McClatchy Newspapers' five California pubs. Sacramento Bee, Modesto Bee, Fresno Bee, Merced Sun-Star and San Luis Obispo Tribune journos crunched the numbers after looking at California Department of Parks and Recreation data.)

​Location: The two miles of sand from Beach Boulevard in Huntington Beach south to the Santa Ana River on the Newport Beach boundary.
Known For: Being a nesting sanctuary for the threatened snowy plover and the rare and endangered California least tern; a ripping bicycle trail; rows of raging bonfires; being crowded as hell on weekends; experiencing the largest single-year rise in crime among state parks (40 percent!).
'09 Reported Crimes: 2,298.
Semi-Serious Nature of These Offenses: Possessing liquor; being drunk on this liquor; underage drinking of liquor; liquor, liquor, liquor; liquor? I hardly knew her!; pot possession; pot smoking; pot, pot, pot; pointing laser devices at snoopy police 'copters; failure to put sunscreen on that skinhead; just generally being all bro-y.

​Location: Three miles of sand from Sunset Beach to Seapoint Avenue.
Known For: Surf fishing for perch, corbina, croaker, cabezon and sand shark; bare-handed fishing for California grunion; leaving the beach with smelly hands because you were just bare-handed fishing for California grunion; watching birds; birds watching people; Corky Carroll's lame-ass surf camp.
'09 Instances of Reported Mayhem: 2,219.
Not-Quite-Totally-Accurate Reason for These Busts: Drunken driving; crashing car into beach structures and being drunk while doing so; crashing car into beach structures and being reckless while doing so; starting a beach brawl because Mario stole your backward baseball cap; fucking with pelicans; fucking pelicans.