I'm confused. Supporters of SanTana's Measure D--which seeks to extend term limits for councilmembers from two four year-terms to three--say the initiative is necessary to curb the power of special interests and developers, a lie we already exposed. But today comes word that SanTana voters are being flooded with a robocall by a Santa Ana school teacher (can't make out the name, but it sounds like Marie) claiming that Measure D "is critically important to ensure ethical and accountable leadership in City Hall." Then the ringer:

Measure D, for Democracy

HA! HA! HA!

Listen to the hilarious robocall:

Yes, I know that's a long-overused joke. But it fits here -- there's a presidential primary coming up, and nowhere in any media outlets have I seen any discussion of the Green Party's presidential candidates.

I understand why: in 2004, Peter Camejo won most of the primaries but the Party gave the nomination to David Cobb anyway, and Camejo bolted to run with Ralph Nader independently. Still, as I am a registered Green, I'd like to know which primary candidate I should support.

So I looked into who's actually running. . .

First, Ralph Nader. Well, his name's on the ballot, but he hasn't officially decided to run yet, and he even kinda-sorta endorsed John Edwards a while back. But now Edwards is gone, so Ralph may run again, despite the fact that almost nobody wants him to.

We like Arizona Senator and Republican presidential candidate John McCain much more than his automaton flip-flopper (and Hugh Hewitt favorite) main opponent, former Massachusetts governor Mitt Romney. But we've never been able to understand why Little Saigon's power brokers never asked McCain to apologize back in 2000, when he appeared before thousands in Westminster's Asian Garden Mall a couple of weeks after referring to Vietnamese as "gooks." McCain offered spin prior to appearing, explaining he only used the slur in reference to his former Communist captors during the Vietnam War, and Vietnamese politicians accepted his worm-out. That didn't placate young Vietnamese-American activists, who protested McCain's appearance and...well, you'll have to read our R. Scott Moxley's disheartening take on it.

Now word comes that State Assemblymember Van Tran and his elected cronies are supporting McCain's campaign. "I am very proud to support John McCain, a man who has done so much for America and for Asian-Americans across our nation," Tran said in the press release. "He clearly is the best candidate to represent all Americans in the White House." The Trannies can support whomever they want, of course, but can you imagine the howls of laughter if Latino politicians endorsed a candidate that used to call Mexicans wabs and beaners, then recanted only upon pressure coming from other people and then claiming they only used the word to describe cholos?

We got a telephone call today from a woman telling us that slender, silver-colored jet aircraft were flying back and forth in the heavens, leaving white smoke trails in their wake. These trails, she added, were drifting apart in the sky, turning it from clear blue to overcast over the course of the day.

"I know you're going to think this is nuts," she said.

Nuts? Why would we think that?

A quick check of the view from our offices on the fifth floor of OC Weekly's world headquarters revealed at least two similar trails, both of which were very wide and cloudlike. You could even say that the portion of the sky where those trails are is overcast. Clearly, these aircraft, posing as innocuous commercial airplanes, are actually weather control devices.

That's right folks, the government is controlling our weather with chem trails!

Don't take our word for it. Check out this video on Youtube of chem trails right here in Orange County. And ignore the idiotic comments by the guy who remarks that chem trails are simply exhaust being emitted by airplanes at high altitude, where the air is cold. Those are contrails, not chemtrails, moron!

POORMAN SUES KDOC: LA Times - Dana Parsons covers the Poorman with typical dollops of smarminess. No genital warts mentioned whatsoever. I'd wax moronic but Luke Y. Thompson already covered this like a month ago (Exit Poorman, Feb. 3). So will he be a Richman? Do fiddlers play on roofs?

DEBBIE #1 GETS A BREAK: OC Register - Deborah Carona, wife of former Sheriff Mike Carona, will not be charged with inappropriate behavior while a member of the Orange County Fair Board, although the prosecution "continues to allege that she participated in schemes to profit from her husband's office." Regardless of what she's charged with, we all know the poor thing is only guilty of marrying a man so tasteless as to choose a mistress with the same name, albeit abbreviated, as his wife, and to allow them both to become involved in his Machiavelli-meets-Rain-Man schemes.

TCA CAN'T BREAK THE LAW (ANY MORE): LA Times - David Reyes maintains the Times' position as 2nd-best source of Foothill-South coverage (next to the Weekly, of course) with this informative piece on the passage of the National Defense Authorization Act 2008, and with it the Davis Amendment which repeals previous exemptions which allowed the Foothill-South to evade California law.

(ANOTHER) OC SOLDIER KILLED IN IRAQ: OC Register - Army Pfc. Brandon Abbott Meyer was killed Monday while on patrol in Mosul. According to the Department of Defense he was from Orange. Meyer and four other soldiers killed fought with 1st Battalion, 8th Infantry Regiment Team, 4th Infantry Division from Fort Carson, Colorado. Meyer joined the Army in January 2007 and would have turned 21 on Saturday. Not old enough to drink in his country, but old enough to die for it.

THE VAGINA MONOLOGUES, 7 p.m.
Because the clitoris is WAY cooler than the penis.
McKinney Theatre, 28000 Marguerite Pkwy., Mission Viejo

THE MAGIC FLUTE, 7:30 p.m.
A visual masterpiece of color and classical music. Read our Leslie Agan's live review.
Renee and Henry Segerstrom Concert Hall, 615 Town Center Drive Costa Mesa

THIRSTY THURSDAYS, 10 p.m.
Feeling dehydrated? Grab a beer.
HB Beer Co. 201 Main St. Huntington Beach

JAZZ AT THE LINCOLN CENTER, 8 p.m.
The best in Jazz comes together for a high spirited night.
Renee and Henry Segerstrom Concert Hall, 615 Town Center Dr. Costa Mesa

GIRLS NIGHT OUT, 9 p.m.
Yep, they just wanna have fun.
Chronic Cantina, 1870 Harbor Blvd. Costa Mesa

Dane Chandler Williams, also known as "Downtown Dane" for his ubiquitous presence in downtown Huntington Beach, was found dead in San Diego. He was in town on a company trip, having worked as an intern for Hurley since October. His body was found wrapped in a blanket in an alley in Chollas Creek.

Williams was last seen at Sixth and K streets leaving the Hard Rock Cafe around 2 a.m. Saturday, according to San Diego police Sgt. Garry Collins. If anyone has any information about his final hours please contact the San Diego Police at (619) 531-2000.

MySpace and Facebook pages have been set up in Dane's honor. A MySpace for a DaneWilliams, 23, in Huntington Beach, describes him as being "at work" and lists his mood as "stoked." May he forever be so.

The Transportation Corridor Agencies has filed a complaint against Vermont-based Smart Mobility alleging that "the company's engineers are unlicensed in California," and are breaking the law by "practicing civil and traffic engineering without legal authorization." Opponents of the TCA's plans to build the Foothill-South (241) toll road extension through inland San Onofre State Beach have used Smart Mobility's reports in the past to refute TCA claims that widening I-5, an oft-cited potential alternative to the toll road, would require the condemnation of hundreds of homes and businesses.

This complaint is not in any court of law, mind you. The TCA registered it with the (drumroll, please...) Board for Professional Engineers and Land Surveyors. Ta-dow. The complaint alleges that Smart Mobility is in violation of The Professional Engineers Act.

"The Professional Engineers Act, which regulates the profession. states that an out-of-state business may only practice engineering in California "if it has a branch office in California, has a part owner or officer in charge of the engineering work in California, who is registered in California and is physically present in California." (Business and Professions Code section 6738(a)(3))"

"There's no engineering behind this study," said Seaton, the toll road spokeswoman. "We're still confident our numbers are accurate."

No engineering, no violation, right?

While I wait for a response from Smart Mobility, a quick perusal of their website suggests that they do not in fact engineer as much as provide advice about engineering. Also, if they sit in Vermont and study a road in California, is that actually conducting engineering within the state? Any engineers or planners are welcome to comment.

I remember SanTana councilmember Claudia Alvarez. I remember back in early 2000, when a friend of mine asked if I could help stuff envelopes for a campaign he was working on for a deputy district attorney. I remember meeting her--young, energetic, sincere--and thinking I wanted more politicians like her in office.

I remember Claudia Alvarez. I remember stuffing envelopes in the garage of her mother's realty firm, bundling up next to the heater as my friends and I worked for free. I remember looking in the trash can and discovering some crazy rag called OC Weekly.

I remember Claudia Alvarez. I remember going to the Orange County Hispanic Bar Association's annual dinner and seeing her charm the socks off everyone after a brief speech. Everyone whispered this lady had a chance at becoming great.

I remember Claudia Alvarez. I remember going to her first fundraiser, at Avila's El Ranchito in Santa Ana. As entertainment, she had a woman singing Mexican standards on a karaoke machine. The lady was so wabby she cracked jokes about Michael Jackson. I sang "Tristes Recuerdos." I sucked.

I remember Claudia Alvarez. I remember hanging with the Democrats in 2000 at whichever Anaheim hotel they always have their post-election party. I remember seeing an exhausted Claudia walk in with her supporters, certain of victory over some Papi Pulido puppet. I had stopped volunteering months earlier on amicable terms, having to concentrate on Chapman University.

I remember Claudia Alvarez. I remember seeing her at SanTana city council meetings, where she would wave hola to me from behind the dais.