The 2015 Oscars Bored Twitter to Death

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No, no, NOOOOOO!!!
Last night the 87th Academy Awards was hosted by Neil Patrick Harris (and can it be the last time pretty please?) and in case you missed out, the viewers were treated to a Tony Awards style entrance, brief nudity (we wish we could unsee), a lot of fucking with Octavia Spencer, and a ton of "jokes" that clearly needed to be rewritten if they were going to get real laughs instead of forced ones.


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The Funniest Grammy Award 2015 Tweets

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ROBYN BECK/AFP/Getty Images
Toro! Toro!
Another year of "questionable" music was met by another year of the Grammy Awards. Hosted once again by LL "lip my lips" Cool J, the 2015 Grammy Awards was riddled with an overflow of performances including Kanye complete with auto-tune, Matador Madonna, Ariana Grande and her faux-ny tail, a PSA (Seriously??) shoved in before a song by Katy Perry, bellhop Pharrell Williams, Adam Levine and Gwen Stefani doing a duet as well as Jesse J and Tom Jones, Lady Gaga and Tony Bennett, Annie Lennox and Hozier, Sam Smith with Mary J Blidge, John Legend and Common--it's like, we got it Grammy's. People can sing together.

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The Funniest Super Bowl XLIX Halftime Tweets

Categories: LOL, Twitter

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David Phillips/AP Photo
One of these things are not like the other.
Brought to you by Pepsi, this year's halftime performance at Super Bowl XLIX with Katy Perry was entertaining but all of the excitement was hardly on a stage in Arizona. A lot of it was on Twitter. Coming out wearing a flame adorned costume and riding on the back of a mechanical lion, Katy sang (and lip synced) some hits to an overly excited crowd. (FYI: Much like sex, we're pretty sure most of those people were faking it or were paid to be there.) She then brought out Lenny Kravitz to duet on "I Kissed a Girl" and as a surprise guest (that we all heard about last week), Missy Elliot graced the stage and pretty much stole the show while Katy played an awkward "hype man." Yuck.

There were also several wardrobe changes (sorry guys, no malfunctions) which lead to tons of pics of Katy side by side with a bag of flaming hot Cheetos, wrestler Bam Bam Bigelow, and Guy Fieri. And to be fair, a lot of people did enjoy the halftime performance (mostly ages 16 and under) but you us by now. And we don't care about highlighting those people. We love a good ol' fashion shit talking session so here are our picks for the best Super Bowl XLIX Halftime Tweets.

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Top 10 Tweeters of 2014

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Comedy Hype
Another year has passed and as it seems with every year that goes by, Twitter just keeps picking up momentum. More comedy inclined folks are oozing out of the woodworks to entertain the masses but with so many accounts to choose from, which ones do you follow? We still stand by last year's list because those 10 didn't disappoint this year either, but, it's a new year so we felt inclined to push forward a whole new group for you to feast on. Putting these tweeters in an order is honestly not fair because they all really slay. But since it is the assignment and since we know you all love a good list (even though you all constantly bitch about them), here is our roundup of the "Top 10 Tweeters of 2014."


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Big Worm Defends Bill Cosby

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Faizon Love as "Big Worm" in the movie Friday
In light of the recent rape allegations against Bill Cosby, the comedy community is divided. Generally this industry sticks together but when a major topic comes up (i.e. rape, racism, disease, national tragedy), it gets split right down the middle. One side inevitably takes the "righteous" route and the other is purely doing their comedic duty by taking these topics and crafting the wittiest jokes they can think of.

We love a good joke because we realize that it's just that, a joke. And regardless of who you are and how you feel about comedy legend Bill Cosby, the jokes are a flyin'. With Twitter being the best place to showcase your thoughts these days and with Bill Cosby trending all over the world for the last week on the daily, we grabbed a few tweets on this very topic from Fazion Love (aka the guy who played "Big Worm" in Friday) because he seems to be one of the few who are taking Dr. Huxtable's side. Actually, if you really read into what Fazion's tweets are saying, it would seem like he has an ulterior motive. And it's all against Hannibal Buress. Sounds to us like Love is spewing a ton of hate.

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Funniest Tweets From the American Music Awards 2014

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Kevin Winter/Getty Images
Ummm...adult Depends much?
Pitbull took the reins with hosting duties for the 2014 American Music Awards and not to be rude (Haha, J/K), he did a better job with his performance with Ne-Yo. There were however plenty of acts to watch this year thankfully. Well, kinda. There was Iggy Azalea giving possibly one of the worst appearances we've seen her do since she fell off the stage at the VMA's, Lorde's spastic, uhhh, "dancing," a mediocre solo performance from Ariana Grande, Lil Wayne and Christina Milian SUCKING, Taylor Swift attempting to dance on stage (as well as off), Fergie (the fuck?), a performance slated as "a very personal song" by Selena Gomez, and J-Lo (who looked like she was wearing a diaper) trying to stay relevant by performing with Iggy Azalea (Enough of Iggy already. Eminem, you got this?). And just a side note here but, was everyone lip-syncing this year? OK, not you Jessie J but everyone else, WTF?

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The Best Tweets During the 2014 Emmy Awards.

Categories: TV, Twitter, comedy

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ChrisPizzello/Invision/AP

Hosted by Seth Meyers, some of the 2014 Emmy Award winners included Sarah Silverman, Louis C.K., Jim Parsons, Allison Janney, Ty Burrell, Stephen Colbert, Anna Gunn, Jessica Lange, and Aaron Paul. While Seth did a decent job with his hosting duties, he in fact said it best when he commented, "Jokes are like nominees, they can't all be winners."

Winners (and lose-bags) aside, the festivities also included Billy Crystal telling a sweet story about Robin Williams, Chris Hardwick giving a PSA on "internet trolls," we saw a funny "Billy on the Street" skit from Billy Eichner, witnessed a sexy PDA fest between Julia Louis-Dreyfus and Bryan Cranston, and watched an interesting performance by "Weird Al" Yankovic. While, some of your personal favorites got robbed at the Emmy's and you just sat there and groaned, our Twitter feed was lit up with comments from those who live to spout off. And trust, the "spout" was on high flow mode during the 2014 Emmy Awards.

See also: Best Tweets During the 2014 VMAs

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The Best Tweets During the 2014 VMAs.

Categories: MTV, Twitter, comedy

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Getty Images
The women ruled the evening at the 2014 MTV Video Music Awards with vag-tastic performances by Taylor Swift, Nicki Minaj, Ariana Grande, Rita Ora, and Iggy Azalea. Not to be outdone, Usher, 5 Seconds Of Summer, and Maroon 5 also gave great performances while overly clothed but hey, we can't all pull off a sparkly unitard. Right, Beyoncé? So while the ladies went with the running theme of hitting the stage in "smaller is better" wardrobe choices, Jay Pharaoh killed it with the impersonations, Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels made cameos, Katy Perry mimicked a prior Britney Spears look, Miley Cyrus helped the homeless, and Twitter, well, they had a shit ton to say about all of it. Here are our picks for "The Best Tweets During the 2014 VMAs."


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Best Phrases Found on Black Twitter Right Now

Categories: Twitter

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As the A$VP MXB continues to inspire the rap community to replace vowels with varied Xs and Vs, a more grammatically based change is taking place once again among those who partake in an offshoot of social media called Black Twitter. Yes, as Salon so eloquently states, Black Twitter is ""a collective of active, primarily African-American Twitter users who have created a virtual community ... [and are] proving adept at bringing about a wide range of sociopolitical changes." It also gives young rappers and the fans that love them a place to congregate and come up with some new terminology that sounds confusing as fuck to the average white person.

Since words like "ratchet" and "YOLO" have become so embarrassingly commonplace thanks to mainstream hip-hop (waiting for Merriam-Webster to add them to the official lexicon any day now) it's only right you get familiar with the next wave of terms populating your favorite rapper's Twitter feed. Here's a list of the best phrases found on Black Twitter right now.

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The Funniest Tweets From the ESPY Awards.

Categories: LOL, Twitter

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Double Lance Cam!
God dammit we hate to say this BUT...Drake did a pretty fantastic job of hosting the 2014 ESPY Awards last night. Between spouting off on Blake Griffin, Donald Sterling, LeBron James, and killing it with the "Lance Cam," Drake actually left us in happy tears rather than the way we like to talk about him being in tears. (Because he's soft. Duh.) Not everyone will agree with our assessment of Drake's hosting duties but nonetheless, in our opinion, the award show was pretty stellar.

Highlights included the inspirational speech given by Stuart Scott (that left us in inspired tears), Michael Sam actually being in tears, the "USA" chant when the US soccer team won, and the wardrobe choices that were less than inspiring (Yeah, we're looking at you Westbrook). And while they crowned the best of the best on the ESPY Awards, some peeps on social media sat back in judgment and let the hilarity fly. Oh you missed it? Not to worry because we trolled what was killing our Twitter feed and it kept us sidetracked from the festivities all while keeping us in stitches.

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