Coachella 2014 Band and Drug Pairings Guide

Categories: Coachella

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Timothy Norris
Ever since sunshine acid saturated Woodstock back in 1969, music festivals and recreational pharmaceuticals have gone together like wine and cheese. Which is why we'd like to recommend a few pairings for those so chemically inclined, a fine list of musical acts coupled with good stuff sure to provide complementary and contrasting flavors for your mind's palette at this year's festival.

Now of course, all of this is at your own risk, we don't endorse any of it, and the author is speaking strictly from a SWIM's (someone who isn't me) sense of experience here cobbled together from the stories of others. That said, you have three days until the festival. Plenty of time to get a solid drug collection together.

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Timothy Norris
Band: Beck
Drugs: Cannabis (Indica) + Ritalin
With its lush orchestral arrangements and cello drones, Beck's latest album Morning Phase complements perfectly the dreamy body buzz brought about by a bong load of sexy purple buds. Since this is a festival and not a plush sofa, a quick sniff of study drugs will do the trick for keeping up the proper headspace for the Odelay-era material.


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Erik Hess
Band: The Replacements
Drugs: Whiskey + Celebrex
At age 54, Paul Westerberg is alt-rock's elder statesman (he's five days older than Michael Stype). Chances are if you're a 'Mats fan, you're no spring chicken yourself. At this stage in the game, proper pre-show precautions are critical for enduring three days of hard partying in the desert. Stretch, hydrate at a 1:1 ratio, and take your arthritis meds. No need to blow out the lumbar ground-pounding on the first night.



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31 comments
karma69usa
karma69usa

First of all, it's Michael STIPE, and being lucky enough to live in Athens, Ga, I don't have to leave my town to go to crappella music festivals like this one anyway, so there's that.

labmonkey
labmonkey

Very irresponsible article, certainly plenty of know-nothing kids go to Coachella every year and indulge in drugs but you should really think about the kind of experience they will have in this environment and really if you want to talk about drugs go to burning man and stop being a drug-poser....

dubyadawg
dubyadawg topcommenter

Awesome and hella funny!  If you have not done Coachella, shut it!  Lots of drugs already make their way in.  Coachella should sell booth space to various drug vendors for the festival.  The booths can offer drug/band pairing advice and a price sheet.  Discounts for university students!  LOVE IT!  


taidodinh
taidodinh

be fun there ready to rock out

Bny Nguyen
Bny Nguyen

Why would OC weekly write this terrible article? Running out of things to write about?

Cameron Reed
Cameron Reed

While this was obviously tongue-in-cheek, it is kind of sad to think that this is really what Coachella has become.

OC Weekly
OC Weekly

Is satire is always lost on you or just today?

Dollene Dicaza
Dollene Dicaza

I'm going now getting ready... C u Ozzie and the rest of Orange County girls like any other fest is about fun !!!! dude just be safe $$$$$

Niko Babic
Niko Babic

Fear & Loathing in Coachella....We can't stop here, its Bat for Lashes country!

Kelly Hughes Davis
Kelly Hughes Davis

I "let" my kid go to Burning Man (he's 25, thus the quotes), but I hope he doesn't tell me he's going to Coachella too! A mom can only worry so much.

Kathleen O'Brien
Kathleen O'Brien

Hmmmm. Not very smart. Encourage alcohol and drug pairings? Completely irresponsible.

Kevin Ells
Kevin Ells

Pretty much nailed it. I also know this is humor.

Nida Akhter Bharmal
Nida Akhter Bharmal

Is this article for real? Why would anyone promote something so ridiculous... Yeah it's at your own risk but to make it sound like an acceptable way of living is outrageous!

Lisa Fletcher
Lisa Fletcher

Really? Expect some people to mix these with devastating effect.

Raffi Zaki
Raffi Zaki

nah im going to Lucidity Festivals this weekend which is what original coachella used to be like before it became a top40 brofest 8) inb4 hipster

BadMuthafucka
BadMuthafucka

@labmonkey Burning Man is an even harsher environment for drug taking. For pros only. Go hard or go home.

labmonkey
labmonkey

@BadMuthafucka @labmonkey  Its a harsher but also more inductive environment no corporate sponsors, and plenty of more experienced trippers to rely on as well as organizations that seek to educate people on the matter like the zendo project

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