Ask Willie D: My Wife Cheated While I Served Overseas. Help!

Categories: Ask Willie D

[Editor's note: Rap pioneer and Geto Boys member Willie D answers reader questions for our sister paper, Houston Press. Something on your mind? Ask Willie D!]

Photo courtesy of Peter Beste

Dear Willie D:

My heart is aching so badly that I barely have the strength to write this letter. I'm a proud soldier in the United States Army. Iraq was my first war. I was deployed there in 2003 and had to leave my new wife and son behind in California. Although it was difficult to be so far away from my family, the pictures my wife posted of her and the baby on social media and the video calls kept my spirits up.

After my first deployment I came home and we moved from a small dingy apartment into a beautiful house. Things were going great. My wife, my son and I were spending a lot of quality time together. I was the happiest man alive. Then I got a call to deploy to Iraq again in 2009. I kissed my wife and son goodbye and off I went to serve my country again.

After about four months into my deployment I started noticing my wife was not as available as she was in the past. Whenever I tried to video call her she would make excuses and say her hair was a mess or she blamed it on technical issues. To make a long and embarrassing story short, I came home at the end of December 2011 when the war ended to find another man living in my house.

To make matters worse, not only did my neighbors tell me they knew but my family knew. My brother said because I was at war the decision was made to tell me just before I returned but because I popped up to surprise everyone they weren't able to notify me in advance.

I can't stop thinking about how she played me. This woman who is supposed to be my wife, moved another man into my house and slept with him while my son was in the next room; all of this while I was risking my life to provide for her and protect our future. I feel like snapping. My mind is gone and life has little meaning. What should I do?

Aching Heart:

Yeah, she really did a number on you, man. If I thought that snapping would help your situation I would tell you to do it, but it won't. If you harm your cheating wife and end up in prison or worse, she wins again. The worst thing you can do to her is move on with your life and live good without her. What she did was incomprehensible. The only type of dude who would be interested in a lowdown woman is a lowdown man, which is the type of dude she's likely to end up with.

I think you should get some professional counseling to cope with your issue because you cannot afford to lose control. You have a 6-year-old son to raise and you can't do it from prison or a pine box.


Dear Willie D:

What are your thoughts on democracy?


As veteran journalist E.J Dionne poignantly communicated, "Oh, yes, it works nicely for the wealthiest and most powerful people in the country, especially if they want to shroud their efforts to influence politics behind shell corporations. It just doesn't happen to work if you think we are a democracy and not a plutocracy."

More Willie D wisdom on the next page.

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