Green Girl Saloon: Where Locals Go to "Bro Down" and Stare at Boobies

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Green Girl Saloon
[Editor's Note: We all know local music and dive bars go hand-in-hand. So in the interest of merging the two together on Heard Mentality, we bring you our newest nightlife column Dive, Dive, My Darling. Read as our bold web editor Taylor "Hellcat" Hamby stumbles into the dive bar scene every week to find crazy stories, meet random weirdos and guzzle good booze.]

My Thursday night started beautifully, with first place in pub trivia at my favorite bar ever (which shall remain unnamed until my final column, which will happen sometime after Cyberdyne Systems goes loco). I told Turk I was going to Green Girl Saloon, and he should join me when his bartending shift was over at 9. When the owner came in to relieve Turk, the bartender told the owner he was going with me to Green Girl. And while the owner had just started, he piped up quickly with "I want to go." Great boss!

So we jumped in our favorite taxi service, Fat Taxi, along with two dudes I've never met (and have since forgotten their names). I had only been to Green Girl once, a few weeks prior, with my buddy and pub-trivia partner-in-crime Leo (team Charlie Bronson's Cock for the win!). It was a mostly uneventful sausage fest--I was the only gal not behind the bar and fully clothed for that matter. And it made sense, since the Green Girl is Westminster's legendary bikini bar; you can see the girls almost every week in our pages, courtesy of the bar's lovely ads. Nothing against Green Girl's ladies, but my favorite people-watching subject that first night was the dude in the Ed Hardy shirt who was overly stoked to hear "Thriller." Get a room, bro.

Thursday's return with my bar buddies wasn't much different--packed, but drama-free. "The first time I came here and saw a girl that wasn't working, I was thrown off," Turk said. Girls for a night out on the town simply don't go to Green Girl. The bar is akin to something you'd see on Mad Men: a place for gents to relax, watch some sports, down some drinks and stare at the scenery. But what surprised me was there were no lechers. Being the lady that I am, my favorite part of Green Girl is the décor--and not just the racks. It has a bright, vintage, English-pub feel complete with fox-hunting paintings, turn-of-the-20th-century advertisements and tin signs. But if you're a stray girl, no worries: The bartenders made me feel welcome enough, and my gentlemen company enjoyed even more hospitality.

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