Our Anti-Valentine's Day Playlist

Categories: Valentine's Day
candy hearts - jena ardell.jpg
Jena Ardell
We're nixing Valentine's Day this year and instead bitterly dancing alone to these anti-love songs. We recommend sharing this playlist with your ex, along with a sexy nude pic so he knows what he's missing. (On second thought . . . maybe you shouldn't). Oh, well. Enjoy:
We promise you're not on ours . . .
"When I get mad and I get pissed/I grab my pen and write out a list/Of all you assholes who won't be missed/You've made my shitlist."

Straight to the point:
"Don't ever look my way/Don't even think I'm playin'/'Cause I fucking hate you/You're such a liar/And I love to hate you/You're all the same to me/When you repeatedly/Take advantage of me/The only thought I get of you sickens me."

We envision Ethan Hawke singing to Wiona Ryder (as he did in Reality Bites) every time we hear this:
"Why can't I get just one screw?/Why can't I get just one screw?/Believe me, I'd know what to do/But something won't let me make love to you."

Ye-ouch:
"You, you don't kiss when you kiss/You don't f*ck when you f*ck/You don't say what you mean/You don't talk loud enough/No pulse in your impulse/Celebration's impossible."

The greatest R&B breakup song from the '90s. It's so pleasant-sounding it's almost passive-aggressive:
"The very things that made me love you/Are the things pushing me away now/In tears, we stand here/With nothing left to say/And all I could do for you/I should've done before now/In tears, we stand here/There's nothing, nothing left to say."


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