Top 10 Ways to Piss Off Your Bartender
|Defacing the bar will not get you your drink faster, FYI.|
3. Ask me to hook you up.
All the booze here costs money. I'm not stealing from the bar just because you asked me to. This also goes for free birthday shots (is that actually a thing anywhere?) and asking for "light ice" to get more booze. You want something? Sorry, gotta pay for it. That's great that it's your birthday or you're offering a fat tip, but I'm not risking my job for you. Also, anyone who says "fat tip" instantly gets crowned King of the Dorks.
2. Ask me if I want to buy a CD from your band.
I don't. It may come as a surprise, but I'm actually trying to make money here, not spend it on some local band's CDR. Do you think I got this job because I'm a huge fan and couldn't wait to see your band? Or maybe I was just stuck behind the bar so I couldn't make it over to the merch table and you're saving me the trip? If I like your band enough to buy a CD, I will ask for one. Also, don't ask me what I thought about your set unless you want an honest opinion, which you don't. Venue bartenders have to sit through anywhere from five to 50 bands' sets per week, depending on where they work. We most likely weren't even paying attention when you played.