Aries Spears Plays a Disgusting Game of "Would You Rather"

Haha, I think you'd look amazing in sequins. OK last one, who would you rather have watch your pets, Mitt Romney or Michael Vick?

Yeah, what Mitt did is pretty pale compared to what Michael Vick did. I'm picking Mitt Romney because again, at least they'd live. Before you go on let me ask you one. Would you rather have sex with a guy who had a two inch penis with thirty million dollars or with a guy with an eleven inch penis who had ten thousand dollars?

Ummm I'm going to go with the two-inches because I'm only 5' 2" so I'm not sure I can accommodate eleven inches if you catch what I'm throwing. I'd also need to know if I'd be getting some of that thirty million. I'd have follow up questions.

[Laughs.] Wow. OK. Nice!

OK back on track! I saw you saying something on Twitter about Jay Pharaoh getting his panties in a wad about you suggesting a "Jay-Z face off" on New Year's. What's the deal?

I'm sure it's pretty much squashed because he got his panties in a wad. I really was looking at it as in a funny thing to do kind of perspective. People say his is incredible, people say mine is incredible, but I think mine is more incredible for certain reasons. I was looking at it as sort of a friendly competition but I guess it's not up for debate.

Lame. So avoiding the family drama this Thanksgiving week aside, what do you have in store for the Brea show?

Hey, since you know that I have a dark side and you can attest to that from the "would you rather" questions, that's really why they should come out! Come see me and stay tuned! That's what it is!

Follow Aries on Twitter @AriesSpears and pick up his newest DVD "Hollywood, Look I'm Smiling" on iTunes and Amazon. Get your tickets now to see Aries Spears at the Brea Improv this Wednesday and Friday through Sunday by calling 714-482-0700 or by logging onto The Improv is located at 120 South Brea Blvd. Brea, CA 92821.

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