Three Ridiculously Bad Celebrity DJ Ventures

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Paris Hilton
Few things stab us in the gut like watching a celebrity try to cut up tracks on a laptop or a pair of turntables. Sure, we'd like to give them the benefit of the doubt that their musical aspirations might be met with some actual practice and soul searching vision. And to those celebrities with actual talent, we're sorry that Paris Hilton is ruining it for the rest of you.

On Tuesday, it was confirmed that Hilton will indeed be releasing a house record and will be getting behind the decks to for a one-hour music festival in Sao Paulo, Brazil on June 23 with more bass-thumping gigs to follow. Apparently dating Dutch producer Afrojack has given her the confidence to step into the spotlight. But one doesn't have to go far back in her past (i.e. the bizarre video for her woozy track, "Drunk Text") to see why celebutantes and music careers don't mix.

With that in mind, we tracked down a few other horrible DJ ventures that sound worse than a needle scratching across the record.

DJ Pauly D

"The Pauly D Project"

DJ Pauly D (aka Pauly DelVecchio) is the crowned prince of reality star DJs. Literally, his signature, hair sprayed quaff is about as crown-like as it gets. But MTV's decision to squeeze some extra juice out his Jersey Shore fame by giving him his own spinoff, "The Pauly D Project" (which premiered March 29 on MTV) is sure to raise some tweezed eyebrows. Now the public can watch him and a few of his collar-poppin' bros from Rhode Island fight, drink and giggle (we know...ew) for an entire season as part of Pauly D's jet-set entourage that follows him on all of his gigs. And if you think a show like this couldn't possibly talk about any real, hard-hitting issues, we'd advise you to take a gander at this video trailer and tell us this show isn't a serious cautionary tale about the effects of spray tan on the brain.

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DJ Khaled

DJ Khaled's series of gangsta Mc Donald's commercials

You know you're getting the hard sell when a commercial selling hot chocolate sounds more like a death threat than a tasty proposition. A few years ago, hip-hop hit-maker DJ Khaled recorded a series of commercials for McDonalds that will have most radio listeners fearing for their lives. Take a listen for yourself. Warning: if you do not buy a McCafe hot chocolate with "whupped cream on top," it sounds like Khaled might just whup your ass.

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Simon Cowell

Simon Cowell's DJ X-Factor show
If you weren't a fan of Simon Cowell after years of crushing dreams with his snide, British accent on the original X-Factor, then you'll really hate him for trying to sell us an EDM version of the show. In January, the 52-year-old talent show mogul announced that he would be launching his new show as part of a competition to find the world's best DJ's. And we all know he's doing it for the love of the music, right? "DJ's are the new rock stars, it feels like the right time to make this show," he said in a statement. It's bad enough that a guy who can't sing makes a fortune degrading singers for a living. But evaluating dance music from a panel chair just carries a certain, um, ick-factor.

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