2) The First In A Series Of Lasts
Like I said, I leave in a few days, and the thing I can't keep from popping in my head is the notion that this tour is essentially a series of potential "lasts". And yes, I know this is a "hiatus" and not a "break-up", and yes I know what "indefinite" means, but what I don't know, is what the future holds for me and my bandmates. I could get hit by a bus in July. (Or tomorrow, actually, but for the sake of this argument, let's agree to ignore that that's even a possibility. Cool? Thanks.) Teppei could become the busiest handcrafted leathersmith on the planet and not have time to tour. (Is leathersmithing a thing? It should be.) Ed could win Mega Millions and move to Hawaii to surf for all eternity. The planets may never align. The Mayans might have been right and the apocalypse might be eight months away. Who knows?
Taking all of that into consideration, I've got to look at our show in Belgium this weekend as "The First In A Series Of Lasts". Will I ever play music in Belgium again? Dunno. Will I ever be in Belgium again? Dunno. Will I ever be in Europe again? Dunno.
Will I ever set foot in The Metro (in Chicago) again? Grub at Stubbs' BBQ in Austin again? Have an incredible day off in Savannah, Georgia? Smell Puget Sound in the air after a show at The Showbox (Seattle)?
Play this song again? Play that song again? Chat with those fans outside the bus in X, Y, or Z?
I guess that's how every day should be lived.
(I apologize for being hyper-cognizant of it, but given the circumstances, I think it makes sense. Maybe my brain being stuck in this cycle and feeling the need to blather about it here will remind you...we have so much to be grateful for, no matter where we are or what we're doing.)
Aaaand, deep breath.