3hree Things: A Box Full Of Cassettes And Shame

By Riley Breckenridge Tue., Feb. 7 2012 at 6:35 AM

Watch out for 3hree Things every Tuesday, where Riley Breckenridge, drummer of Orange County's favorite local alt-rock band Thrice, gives his take on life in Southern California as an OC native.

I'm not gonna lie. I didn't spend my formative years as a music listener (late-80's/early-90's) listening to Fugazi, or Black Flag, or My Bloody Valentine, or MC5, or The Melvins, or this seminal band, or that seminal band*. Nope. Instead, I'd my way over to the Peer Records that used to be in the Irvine Marketplace, and stock up on piles of new cassettes and cassette singles full of audio garbage to willingly assault my earholes with.

I remember a fair share of those regrettable purchases (many of which have appeared in my Flashback Friday posts on my blog), but through the magic of selective memory I figured I'd actually managed to purge most of those regrettable purchases from the deepest recesses of my brain. That changed when I spent some time cleaning out my mom's garage and found (no lie) three huge boxes FULL of cassettes from the early-'90s.

Right there, plain as day. Physical evidence of my poor decision-making, financial irresponsibility and godawful taste.

"Hey, just in case you forgot how much of an idiot you were, here are three massive boxes to ~~throw you into a mild depression~~ jog your memory a bit."

What follows, is a look at three of the worst from ONE box of worstness. I might save the other two boxed piles-of-disappointment-encased-in-an-obsolete-audio-medium for a day when I feel like I need to knock my middling self-worth down a few pegs.

1) 2 Live Crew, "Head, Booty & C*ck" (1988)

This song is NSFW, or anywhere really. Ever.

"Wait...what is he asking us?"

"I think the first thing is if we like head."

"Ah. Yeah, man. I'm into it. Who isn't? K, what's the second thing?"

"Booty, I think. He's asking if we like booty."

"Well, yeah. I like booty...if it's clean and doesn't look like a stuffed laundry bag. So yeah, we're two-for-two. What's the last thing?"

"Cock."

"Uh..."

Tags:

2 Live Crew, Crash Test Dummies, Riley Breckenridge, The Boys, Thrice

We Recommend

Karl Domning

That's easy. You had whiskey drink, then a vodka drink, then a lager drink,

edit: whoops, ment for a replay for Sharpie.

Sharpie

Tubthumping -Chumbawumba -.- Not entirely sure what was wrong with me...

Karl Domning

That's easy. You had whiskey drink, then a vodka drink, then a lager drink,

Ashley Victoria Vinck

My worst purchases have been Aaron Carter, Ke$ha, and Metro Station. I regret everything.

Michael Pollard

Puddle of Mudd. It easily makes it to the top of the list. I feel better about venting my shame.

Sebas

(hed) pe, Ace of Base, Linkin' Park, Ghostbusters II OST, Abba Teens (only Mamma Mia's single in cassette), Thric...eem no, I mean, never mind :)

Btw, I did buy Crash Test Dummies' CD and I like it quite a lot, you shouldn't be ashamed of that. The CD had a few good songs.

gies

I actually like that Crash Test Dummies album. So sue me. I think it's really quite good. 'Mmmmm Mmmmmm Mmmmmm' maybe isn't the best track on the album but there are some good songs on that record. In fact, I'm gonna go listen to it right now.

geofflives

The Better Life-3 Doors Down... whoops.

Alex

Adams family rap. Yes. Hammer is the posterboy for shame

Down with the Sickness.

Crazy Town is pretty bad. On the other hand, I went out and MOWED LAWNS so that I could have enough money to buy Disturbed's - The Sickness. I begged my mom to drive me into town (15 miles or so) as soon as I had the $18 to fund that bands pleather jeggings and facial hair stylists. I am so ashamed of buying this album that I wouldn't even log into facebook to make this comment as I was scared it would somehow get passed on to my friends that there is a good chance Down with the Sickness is sitting in a box in my storage. Ooh Ah Ah Ahh.

Honorable mentions: Chumbawamba - Tubthumper, Bush - Razorblade Suitcase, Tonic - Lemon Parade, I Know What You Did Last Summer O.S.T., Alanis Morisette - Jagged Little Pill, Jamiroquai - Virtual Insanity (Cassingle).There's also all the Backstreet Boys, StainD, and Godsmack cassettes that I recorded off the radio.