Where's
Lil Kim when you need her?
Historically, the MTV Video Music Awards have been the scene of mammary massacres for
Boob Wars since time immemorial (or at least 1984). But this year, it looks like a cease fire was imposed. Just check out how chaste superpowers like Katy Perry and Lady Gaga--
cold cut combo attire aside--looked. Hell, even an upstart Boob Nation like Snooki was demure.
Were there any skirmishes? Sadly, yes. And the results weren't pretty.
When the only movement in a Boob War comes from Ke$ha and a 64-year-old Cher squeezed into a 21-year-old Bob Mackie bodysuit, you know things are bad. And don't think I'm bagging on Cher because of her age. It's already on the record that, at 65, I still
consider Helen Mirren one of the sexiest women in the world. But unlike Cher, she has the good sense of not wearing the
same outfit she sported in 1989 to a big, televised event in 2010.