Despite the hyper-patriotic ravings of Rush Limbaugh and Bill O, most Americans, whether liberal or conservative, understand the true meaning of Independence Day--or would if they didn't get so wasted every time the holiday rolled around. Yes, the 4th is a basically a national block party chock-full of binging behaviors that annually demonstrate American excess. And whodathunk that music fans in Orange County have a wealth of options to indulge in.
Whether looking for a fireworks spectacular to take your kids to, or looking for a spot to descend into raging alcoholism (with the bonus of good tuneage), we've got you covered. Here's a list of some of the coolest events happening this weekend. If we've missed something, write your congressman, you fucking communist!
Saturday, July 3
If, like all good Americans, you're rebellious at heart
Who you'll see: The Dum Dum Girls. Detroit Bar has a nice selection of reasonably priced booze, and a good looking clientele, but that's not why you're going. Saturday's show features a band both easy on the eyes and ears. The Dum Dum Girls feature catchy neo-goth-pop jams with reverb-soaked vocals. There's a $12 cover charge so make sure you've got enough in the checking account.
If you're a cowboy hat-wearing flag-hanging in your house patriot...
Who you'll see: Jimi Nelson and the Drifting Cowboys. For the Stetson hat/cowboy boot set uninterested in shelling out the dough for a cover charge, there'll be cheap booze and cheap women (maybe). This place has the feel of a real honky-tonk, and Jimi Nelson brings the true flavor of rockabilly in all its pedal steel glory. If you're lucky, he might just play his version of Prince's Purple Rain. Perfect for those vintage music fans who are disenchanted with the nouveau-greaser crowd one normally finds at the Hootenanny .
If you want to contribute to the social welfare by paying through the nose for alcohol and inflating your local beer vendor's annual reported income...
Who you'll see: A ton of bands and a cool car show. An Orange County tradition for over a decade, the Hootenanny is dusty, dirty and greasy. But it has Jerry Lee Lewis and Chuck Berry.
If you want to witness a true golden-oldie...
Then you'll want to go to: Sutra
's 4th of July Freedom Fest with Vanilla Ice, Costa Mesa
Who You'll see: The great white hype himself is slated to appear. But we're more interested in seeing Huntington Beach hillbilly punks, The Skatanic Rednecks. Tickets run $20, but the proceeds go toward the F Cancer Foundation. Bonus--board shorts and bikinis are acceptable attire.
If you want to celebrate the birth of the nation by experiencing Orange County's second best attraction, by-proxy...
Who You'll see: No Duh. A loving tribute to Orange County mainstays, No Doubt.
Sunday, July 4
If you want the experience of New Orleans without all the oil slick, deprivation and mold....
Then you'll want to go to:
BBQ Brews and Red White & Blues on the The Queen Mary
, Long Beach
Who you'll see: Grammy award winning Zydeco violinist Lisa Haley. Whether the Cajun sounds of Louisiana are your cup of tea or not, it's still great open-air drinking music. And we can think of fewer places to get blot-toed around Orange County that are more picturesque.
If you want to embarrass the kids with corny drunken lip synching of show-tunes from your youth...
Then you'll want to go to: The Mission Viejo Annual Street Faire and Fireworks Spectacular
Who you'll see: None other than ShaNaNa has-been Johnny Contardo. Featured in the 1978 movie Grease, Contardo is on the fast track to resurrecting his career, one county fair at a time. The fair will also be serving booze and will climax with a fireworks show. (949) 830-7066
If you want to shelter your kids from life's harsh realities...
You'll want to go to: Huntington Beach 4th of July Parade & Pier Festival
Who you'll see: Radio Disney's "Next Big Thing," Jasmine Sagginario. The AM 1110 Road Crew will be on hand along with on-stage performances and prizes. And with the Gestapo like presence of Huntington's finest (thank you rioters of 1986 OP Pro), order will be maintained at all costs.
If you want to have your mind blown...
You'll want to go to: Verizon Amphitheater, Irvine
Who you'll see: The Pacific Symphony's tribute to John Denver. Fuck the fireworks show, you'll be amazed that there are still enough John Denver fans to fill an amphitheater. (714) 755-5799.