Tonight: KISS

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KISS plays tonight at the Honda Center. And while I've always wondered what in the hell anyone sees/hears in this shitty band, I do have to respect grown men who've taken some of the worst rock songs of all time and turned it into a franchise.

For example, for those of you going to the show tonight in your KISS t-shirts, I hope you bring your KISS Kondoms in hopes of meeting a KISS fan. Then, maybe you can take said KISS fan to the KISS hotel, where you'll jump on the KISS mattress and, if you're lucky, engage in a KISS kiss. From there, it's time to take off your KISS underwear and get down to KISS business. Let's just hope that by the end of your romp you don't die and wind up in your KISS Kasket because if you perish, that means less cash for Gene Simmons and company and God knows he don't want that.